You Didn't Ask For This

100 | Floor Pizza

Matt Shea and Eric Poch

After four years, we've finally hit the big milestone: episode 100! For this very special occasion Matt and Eric record in person, interviewing each other with personal questions that the other doesn't know about. Then, Matt springs a new game on Eric, inspired by the British TV show "Taskmaster."

But the big announcement is...we're launching a Patreon! 
Don't worry, we're keeping it humble:

$1/month = YDAFT Punks

  • Access to the YDAFT Discord

$4/month = YDAFT Giants

  • Access to the YDAFT Discord
  • 20% off all merch (coming soon!)
  • And exclusive access to our new monthly bonus episodes..."Opps! All Tangents!" 

"Oops! All Tangents" is a shorter, question-free episode dropped on the first Friday of every month. We'll tell longer stories, take deep dives into specific topics, and do all sorts other fun things we can't fit into our regular episodes. Join us!

Go to https://www.patreon.com/youdidntaskforthis to become a member! 

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We're on TikTok now! Go see our dumb faces!

Submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!

Join our Patreon!

What's included?
$1/month = YDAFT Punks

  • Access to the YDAFT Discord

$4/month = YDAFT Giants

  • Access to the YDAFT Discord
  • 20% off all merch (coming soon!)
  • And exclusive access to our new monthly bonus episodes..."Opps! All Tangents!"

"Oops! All Tangents" is a shorter, question-free episode dropped on the first Friday of every month. We'll tell longer stories, take deep dives into specific topics, and do all sorts other fun things we can't fit into our regular episodes. Join us!

Go to https://www.patreon.com/youdidntaskforthis to become a member!

We're on TikTok now! Go see our dumb faces!

Submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!...

Eric:

This is wild.

Matt:

Here we are In the flesh.

Eric:

I'm looking right at you.

Matt:

Face to face, which, I have to say, is extremely intimate right now.

Eric:

It's weirdly intimate, because when we're doing it online, your head, your face, I'm closer on your face and it's taking up most of my screen, but this is so much more.

Matt:

There's no distractions, there's no delay, because we have chosen, for this very special occasion, to be in person with mic stands. We just had a significant technical delay getting these two mics to play nice.

Eric:

Yeah.

Matt:

Like an hour, like literally an hour of me troubleshooting on the floor.

Eric:

Matt was fighting for his fucking life to get this episode up and running.

Matt:

But enough about the technical jargon, eric. This is the cold open of episode 100. One hundo, one hundo. Let's make it fun-do. We've got, and we've got something. Very. We've got a couple of things to talk about. Yes, a couple of announcements to make. Yes, I've got a couple of things to talk about. Yes, a couple of announcements to make. Yes, I've got a secret bit for you.

Eric:

Matt has been selling me on this secret bit. Don't oversell it. I'm not going to oversell it, but, needless to say, I know nothing about it other than it is a bit and it is secret.

Matt:

Now, to be fair, I could have told you about the bit and you still know nothing about it.

Eric:

Correct. I have built in safety mechanisms for secrets, meaning what your brain, yeah. Short-term memory is overrated.

Matt:

I think we got a lot to get to Eric we do so let's get started. Let's fucking go. Number one hundo Hundo baby here, get started.

Eric:

Let's fucking go. Number one Hundo, hundo, baby, here's to you, baby, here's to you. Baby, here's to you, you pretty son of a bitch.

Matt:

Oh, you beautiful bastard. Well hello everybody and welcome to you. Didn't Ask for this the podcast answering life's least pressing questions, although maybe not today. My name is Matthew Shea. My name is Eric Poach. Eric Poach, welcome to my basement.

Eric:

It is such a nice basement. Thank you, such a nice basement.

Matt:

Thank you. It's only technically a basement in the sense that we're half underground, but it's a split foyer this house.

Matt:

This kind of splits the uprights between a basement and a conversation pit and I'm getting the best parts of both. You know, it's interesting that you would bring that up because we just went to our very first HOA meeting not long ago and they showed us the original brochure for this development from 1977. Yeah, and they called it a cuddle pit. We don't have one, but there you could get a conversation pit that was called a cuddle pit.

Eric:

which is what if they were calling it a cuddle pit in the 70s? Definitely, definitely low-key advertising, primo orgy space 100%.

Matt:

Lindsay and I immediately. So there's like a couple of young people and mostly older people in our neighborhood, right, and so we immediately were like, oh, everybody in here were swingers 100%, and I was like, oh, right on the planter at the top of the stairs, that's where the key bowl goes. And they did. They laughed. The young people laughed hysterically. All the old people gave like a polite chuckle.

Matt:

And I said I guess you weren't ready for that. Yeah, or you were all here and you all been fucking in my house, is what I'm hearing, guess you guys weren't ready for that, but your kids were conceived because of it.

Eric:

Nice, eric, nice.

Matt:

Very good, yeah. So this I will say this is odd that we are doing this in person. We don't have headphones on.

Eric:

No, which is scaring the shit out of Matt.

Matt:

It's scaring the shit out of me because I can't babysit, and now there's a bird outside. I love this.

Eric:

I'm used to hearing like lawnmowers, arguments and dogs barking outside of my window. Back home I'm just getting like I'm a raw dog in nature behind me.

Matt:

That is what this is to live here. Sarah and Carissa, former guests of the show. They were here once upon a time. Well, they've been here many times, but they were here once upon a time in the early spring when the spring peepers, which are frogs, were in the pond right behind my house.

Eric:

Had a different meaning in the 70s.

Matt:

Had a different meaning in the 70s, and that is again. The name of the animal is a spring peeper. There's probably I'm going to just conservatively say thousands of them in this pond and it is like literally a white noise machine of chirps. It's like you can't distinguish them as frogs. At first I thought they were cicadas, but it was still cold, so I was like it can't be cicadas, like it's loud, but we don't notice it.

Matt:

Me and lindsey are like, oh, the two of them were sarah and carissa were like I, that is so loud. And we're like, oh, oh, the frogs.

Eric:

I don't even, we don't even hear them anymore and just background noise but I'm glad that period is over.

Matt:

They finally shut the fuck up and at last we have peace and at last we have some level of peace. Yes, now Eric, for this 100th episode, we have chosen to do something very intimate, very bold we are going to have sex. No.

Zack Deuce:

Wow.

Matt:

We are going to interview one another. Yeah, we have questions prepared. Neither one of us know the questions.

Eric:

No, we're doing this James Lipton style, babe, neither one of us know the questions.

Matt:

No, we're doing this James Lipton style babe. Now we also have a number of. We invited the masses, the audience, strangers, whoever wanted to be part of the 100th episode, to send in whatever they want to the voicemail, to the thought line.

Eric:

Thoughts, well wishes, curses.

Matt:

And so we have a couple, including a late entry. Um, should we kick things off by listening to to?

Eric:

one of them.

Matt:

Oh my god, pop that fucking cork well, you know we talked about sarah and carissa. I know that they submitted one. Should we start there?

Eric:

please. This is like the best way to start my day.

Sara and Carissa:

Hey Coach, hey Matt, Congratulations on 100 episodes. It's Sarah and Carissa, by the way. We've been here since the beginning and we love you both very much. We are so proud of all the work that you've done, all the laughs, all the tears, all the inspiration and all the things that nobody ever asked for and, honestly, our only complaint is that there's not enough Matt and Poe time.

Matt:

That's interesting.

Sara and Carissa:

So please continue for at least another 100 episodes. Thank you for everything and we hope to be back on the show for guest appearances. Part two Anytime yeah. Wink, wink, wink, bye, we love you.

Eric:

They have a key to the house. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Also. I love you both so fucking much.

Matt:

Yes, we obviously adore you, you both.

Eric:

Also, this is setting the tone, calling it now I am going to be crying before this episode's end.

Matt:

There's a very real chance of that Poach. Okay, because all my questions I also have a polygraph that we're going to hook you up to. Oh, I do think it'd be fun to do a what is it Vanity Fair style lie, lie detector, uh episode? Oh, that would be a hoot where we break up our friendship officially by asking the tough questions yeah, I mean, we could do it a lot cheaper.

Eric:

We just play monopoly or open up risk again that, could you know?

Matt:

that could be fodder for, um. Well, you know what, since they kind of teed us up by saying, like there's not enough of matt and eric, yeah, uh, I mean, we are bi-weekly show. Yeah, should we start things off with the announcement? Yeah, I think it's time, folks, after 100 episodes, we're quitting uh, we're, uh, we're done.

Eric:

I mean, what, what? What other mountains are there?

Matt:

to climb. I'll tell you what other mountains there are to climb. Oh, the Patreon point. There it is Patreon. Peak Yep Folks. You didn't ask for this is launching a Patreon.

Eric:

We didn't sell out, we bought in.

Matt:

We didn't sell out. You did yes, so don't worry, we're keeping things humble. You did yes, so we it's a don't worry, we're keeping things humble. Okay, yeah, we're. We're going to have two tiers to this Patreon, okay, and we've got a number of treats to entice you. But basically it's just to make sure that we can start giving you more content better content, yes and can also like you more content, better content, yes, and can also like support, actually the show itself.

Eric:

Yeah, because we would. You know it, despite what you may believe, doing a podcast of quality, quality Costs money.

Matt:

We won't say what kind of quality.

Eric:

No.

Matt:

We wouldn't prescribe that upon ourselves. No, I think it speaks for itself. It speaks for itself, but there is a cost. There is a cost Physically and emotionally, and financially, yeah, and fiscally, I should have said.

Eric:

Patreon helps with one of those Most of it.

Matt:

Yeah, so the first tier, just charging you $1. $1. One USD, just charging you one dollar. One dollar, one u s? D and one dollar gets you exactly one perk, which is the next part of what we are launching, which is a discord.

Eric:

You daft cord, you daft cord. That was off the fucking dome. Talk to us anytime, anywhere, and by us I kind of mean poach yeah, I'm in discord all the time, so you know, if you want to hang out with me while I play chivalry and fight yeah, people like knights and such and and we were talking about this before we started I'm more of a slack person.

Matt:

Yes, you're more of a discord person, so I I want to put it on mic on radio, on the record you are spearheading I am spearheading the discord in our show.

Eric:

You officially have I mean, that's pretty much what I've been doing since day one a tangible outside of recording responsibility I have deliverables you have a deliver.

Matt:

I'm giving you precisely one deliverable. It's going to go great. It's going to go great. So, and I'm going to get involved, I'm going to be there as well. I will go so far as to put discord back on my phone. Yeah, but uh. So we'll be there. You can chat with us, you can hang out with us, as you're a PC gamer. You're a PC gamer, so you do the Discord thing all the time.

Eric:

Yeah, I'll also add if this spices the pot that's a phrase people say. It's a spicy pot, sure.

Matt:

You love a pot full of spice? Double down on the thing. No one's ever heard before. Yeah spicy ass pot there's no way I'm allowing spicy ass pot to be the name of this episode.

Eric:

And for anyone who's curious about Discord, if you're just a listener, it's free. You download the app is free. You don't have to pay anything. You don't have to do anything other than give us a dollar a month to be added to our discord.

Matt:

Yeah, discord is free. It's it's our discord, that's not yeah it's our discord.

Eric:

That's not. Since we're coming up on spooky season. I think I've been due overdue for a replay of a game called alien isolation alien isolation, where you are stuck on a ship with the alien from aliens and it is hunting you and it is one of the scariest games I've ever played. I played a little bit of it, loved it. Then adhd kicked in. I forgot it existed, and now I have. I have never returned to it since so I'm gonna restart my playthrough of alien isolation.

Eric:

So if anyone wants to hang out in our discord and just watch me be scared out of my fucking mind, give us a dollar a month. There you go, and then I'll pop in with quips oh he'll, oh my god, the peanut gallery that will be matt shea as I fight for my fucking life on the Nostromo.

Matt:

But Eric, let's get to the meat and potatoes here. Let's get to the real thing. So if you because dollar a month, who isn't throwing a dollar away on just accidentally, I sneeze, I lose a dollar In this economy, yeah, I mean. So we don't think it's a ton to ask you want to support the show? You can get the Discord, it'll be great. Dollar a month, but for $4. For four, for $4 a month. We're calling that first tier, you daft punks, because we love you baby.

Eric:

Dollar a month. You're a daft punk.

Matt:

Yeah, as we've said, we tried to adapt you daft. Yeah, as we've said, we tried to adapt Udaf Punk as the name of our fans. So we're putting that at the base here. Thank you, alyssa. But we've also done, courtesy of Alyssa, of course. But we've also talked a lot. Much and more has been made of the Udaf giants throughout the 100 episodes Such as Sarah and Carissa, such as Sarah and Carissa. We have to temporarily strip that title away, because now we're applying it to a monetary Now we're putting it behind a paywall.

Matt:

We're putting it behind a paywall. You're welcome. That paywall is $4 a month and here's what you're going to get for the DAF giant level. That's it. Two tiers, that's it. That's it. We may introduce a third tier down the road once we're big and successful. You know once, but not Rogan values, but not Rogan values. Rogan money, not Rogan values $4 a month gets you the following Discord access 20% off our incoming merch. We're going to have merch babies.

Matt:

By the end of 2024, we will have merch. We are working on it, we're trying to get everything up and running as we talked about in the previous episode. But the big kahuna, yeah, is. We are introducing a monthly bonus episode and we are calling it and this might tickle the tail feathers a little bit folks, oops, all tangents, oops, all tangents, no questions, all tangents. We're going to be telling long form stories that don't fit into the show. We're going to be going maybe do some deep dives on specific topics from time to time.

Eric:

This is just kind of the dumping ground for all the shit that matt tells me we cannot, we can.

Matt:

how can we fit a 20 minute story into the episode poach, exactly exact the mole, and so that caught. So all those things, discord, access, oops all tangents, 20 off all our incoming merch. That is all yours for $4 a month. Eric, I just pulled up my Starbucks app. Okay, okay, a grande pumpkin spice latte, psl yes, is $6, and change Six fucking dollars, $6 and change. So, less than a PSL, less than a latte a month. You get a bonus you didn't ask for this in the form of Oop's All Tangents. You get 20% off our soon-to-be-released merch. You get the Discord access. I think it's a pretty fucking good deal.

Eric:

Yeah, that's two-thirds of a PSL For two-thirds of a PSL, you get this amazing deal.

Matt:

Yeah. So there's the sell. I don't think we need to take up more airtime with this. In fact, we probably took up too much. This deal speaks for itself. So the link to our Patreon is in the show notes here. It's going to be on all our social media at. You Didn't Ask Pod. That's the letter. You Didn't Ask Pod. Go check it out. If you love the show and want to support us, we'd love to see you there and reward you with some oops, all tangents. Thanks babes, thanks babes, and that's it.

Eric:

No more hard sell right, no more hard sell, we're done. Hard selling, we're done.

Matt:

My whiskey is starting to kick in you know we'll mention it at the the end of episodes, here and there probably. But like listen, we appreciate if you, if you don't have the money you don't want to cash in, don't worry, it's fine.

Eric:

The original show will always be free yeah, we are never going to paywall anything we've made gotta make that crystal clear.

Matt:

It will be free. Oops, all tangents you'll be able to get in whatever podcast app you use. It'll just be under a separate listing, so you'll get it there and you can get all the other episodes from that feed as well, so you can have everything in one place. And again, all of that information is in the show notes. I think that's enough of the opening business, eric. Should we get down to it? Let's fucking go. So do I ask you a question first or do you ask me a question first?

Eric:

You've been doing a lot of talking, thank you, and you're very good at it, thank you. I talking, thank you, and you're very good at it. Thank you, I'm going to talk now. Okay, I'm going to ask you a question.

Matt:

I'm going to set the tone. Isn't that? Isn't that you prompting me to talk more?

Eric:

So your first question Okay, I'm ready, I'm nervous, let's just get into it.

Matt:

I'm fucking nervous here.

Eric:

Matt, when was the last time you cried, and why?

Matt:

Wow, you know, I've got. I had shit like that and I threw it out because I was like, okay, all right. Last time I cried I think it was last week. Okay, uh, it was private. Lindsey doesn't know this.

Matt:

She's finding this out in the episode okay uh, I had myself a little bit of a panic attack about. You know, life stresses, my guy Dude. Yeah, you know, valid, all the shit that's hitting the fan. You know, I let that wash over me. Perhaps I was in an elevated state. Who could say? Who can say who could say who can say I was in an elevated state? Mm-hmm, and yeah, some tears started, started rolling. I think that was the last time I the literal last time might not be the funniest last time, but I think that's the last time I cried buddy yeah, I mean and and honestly good.

Eric:

Not the anxiety, that's never good, but it's like anxiety is gonna happen and I'm always grateful when my dude friends can cry. It's fucking hard Like I'm. I am always grateful when a man tells me that they had a good cry.

Matt:

I'll tell you this. There are times this isn't one of them, but this there have been times when I have tried to like sit down in a chair and be like I got. I just got to cry.

Eric:

It's the worst and I can't and I'm and I'm unable to summon it up the worst feeling on earth, like knowing you have to.

Matt:

I want wanting to. I want it. I need to get them tears and that social programming says no, that social programming says absolutely. Not. So, eric, I think it's time you talk for a while okay, hit me I'm gonna give you something good. Okay, I've got a list here, and and so do you, but I'm just going to go with my first thing. Okay, we've talked about this before a little bit, but I'm asking you serious.

Eric:

This is serious faces on.

Matt:

What is it about the mosh slash rave lifestyle that you enjoy so much?

Eric:

Oh, I love this question and I may have touched on this before, yeah, but I want to like lean into this answer.

Matt:

But what I'm saying is it's always been part of a bit about how much, oh, I won't be caught dead, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, I want you to actually tell me. So like what appeals? Yeah, why do you do it?

Eric:

Because I can't think of anything worse. So what, what? What is it that you love about? So? So this is my take, and this is honestly my take, not just on moshing, but on our, on our species, human beings yeah, got to where we are by being aggressive and warlike. Yeah, like we, we got to the top of the chain. But it's a two-pronged thing. One is jolly cooperation. We, we work together, we commune together. Jolly cooperation, yeah, yeah. But the other hand of that is we also got to where we are by being more violent and aggressive than the other things that could potentially harm or eat us.

Eric:

Sure, this isn't to condone violence or encourage it, but something that I think we need to acknowledge about our species is that we need these sort of releases for a natural aggression that is inside of us. We and I don't mean this as a diss, it's just an observation we are, our brain is hardwired to get off on vengeance. We love schadenfreude, we love fucking. We, we love having something to fight against and for it. Just get. It gets us into that reptile brain flow state. Yeah, a mosh pit, a rave, yeah, anywhere like these types of spaces is such a wonderfully healthy and safe environment to release that energy, because otherwise it just builds up, it just it's. It's like that. Like it it's just throwing marbles into a fine crystal brandy glass and then, once it's full, they have to keep going in so that, like, either you empty some marbles out to make room or the glass shatters so you're saying it's sort of like, like those the, the sort of new craze, the rage room where you go and like, destroy shit yes, like, but safely.

Matt:

Like you got goggles and safe masks and stuff, but like you can smash up a table and and all this different stuff.

Eric:

I haven't done one and and I would say I'd like to and I would say the advantage that this has over the rage room, yeah, is, remember, it's two-pronged. We're we're naturally have like that level of aggression that we need to let out, but also community mosh pit is a community. No one in that pit. And, and the big asterisk next to this is, there will always be assholes. There will always be people who, like, are looking to harm others. Yeah, but that's true of any space you will enter forever there's always going to be a toxic person in any community three percent of every all the people you'll ever meet will be complete irredeemable assholes.

Eric:

It's okay, yeah, um, but when you're moshing, you're doing it with other human beings. It creates that shared sense of purpose, like it's not just you alone in a room punching wall or like yeah like isolating you with your bad feelings.

Eric:

That's where that's. That's not good, that's not good for your brain. But when you're throwing each other around and everyone understands that they're there consensually to do this together and like a shared purpose, all for a band you fucking love, it is a safe, healthy, communal way to release that pressure. It's almost like meditation, it's like battle meditation, but but to kick ass music.

Matt:

So yeah well, I don't know about that last part you weren't selling me for a while. And then the kick-ass music kick-ass music. Can you tell me any lyrics? Anyway, we don't need to go into.

Eric:

All my life I has to fight. Sorry, going for that, that wasn't. I think that was Kendrick.

Matt:

Hey, how about another question? Yeah?

Eric:

So here we go. What is something you have always wanted to say to someone and like so there's. There's someone could have been years ago in your life. There's something you have always wanted to say to them, but you never did. What is it you wanted to say? Don't tell me who it is okay, so don't don't tell you who it is don't we don't name drop, just say say get it off your chest, huh um, we don't name drop, just say get it off your chest.

Matt:

You've done a lot of good for what you've been. You've done a lot of good. And I think you have confused that and confused your level of success with the idea that you, the human, deserve it Too much.

Eric:

No, that was perfect, Not enough.

Matt:

That was you nailed it All right. That was a quick one, though.

Eric:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, some of them can be quick, some of them we can marinate.

Matt:

Eric, what's your favorite?

Eric:

sandwich Dog. I was talking about this the other day. This is like not only my favorite sandwich, it is my ultimate comfort food. And I know it's my ultimate comfort food because I don't eat it all the time. So when I do eat it it's like oh right, god, that hits, I gotta be, I got to like the right sandwich is orgasmic. Yes.

Eric:

So, simple, simple, simple, simple Toasted bread, not too dark, I want. I want firm. I want that nice. I got to have that nice firm, like toasted. There's no bend to the bread anymore. But it's not like dark, it's not like blackened toast.

Eric:

Proper toast, like dark, it's not like black. Yeah, yeah, proper toast mayo both, both pieces of bread, love it thickly cut homegrown tomatoes okay, layer them about, like like I need. I need a solid two layer base layer of tomato and then a second layer of tomato on top. Okay, salt, salt, okay pepper, and then there's a special seasoning I discovered in recent years that goes, so it's called mr crunchy it is.

Eric:

It is a blend of like peppercorns that have been blasted like mixed with some like spices and such. It is the most horrifying brand mascot on the bottle you ever. Look it up, mr crunchy, the label will give you nightmares. It pairs perfectly with tomato. That's the sandwich, A tomato sandwich. Salt pepper, maybe some extra spices, mayo Not a meat to be found. Not a meat to be found. Wow, Eric, I'm surprised. It is so the simplicity of it.

Matt:

I'm going to try it.

Eric:

I will try this.

Matt:

I'm intrigued because you, a meat eater, are telling me about it. I will try it. Yeah, if a vegan came to me with this, well, I guess the mayo wouldn't be there. But who's living life without mayo? Am I right, correct? Come on, fuck, miracle Whip. Oh, we are in total agreement this fuck, miracle Whip.

Eric:

That's why we're friends.

Matt:

If anyone tells me that Miracle Whip is the same thing as proper mayo, as a good Hellman's, even as a Duke's okay, even as a fucking Duke's I want you to picture the beginning of GoldenEye when Bond jumps off the dam yes, which they recently went to that dam in a season of the Amazing Race. Nice yeah, and they jumped off of it.

Matt:

But the one doing that, he bungee, jumps off the top of this dam. It's in like Sweden or something I forget. Yeah, you ain't getting a cord. Friends, you like Miracle, whip Off the dam, you're getting a nice elbow right off the end.

Eric:

You know what? Let's just get this right into the hundo now. If you like Miracle Whip, you can go fuck. You can go fuck If you come into my house and you see Miracle Whip. No, you didn't.

Matt:

Don't be coming into our Discord with Miracle Whip propaganda.

Eric:

So yeah, that's my perfect sandwich.

Matt:

I think it's good. And now let me tell you something that I've recently been experimenting with and I this, I'm not gonna, we're not. These are individual questions. I'm are individual questions. I'm not getting into my sandwich, but recently, um, for our like daily driver, lunchtime sandwich, like the innards, just a turkey cheese for for me and lindsey I'm just whipping it up real quick. Turkey, a little workday lunch, right. Here's what I've been doing for the sauce, for the sauce, for the sauce okay, mayo, a little squirt mayo both sides, right, both breads. Little squirt of mustard, okay, get that going, get that nice, and and and mixed sprinkle, healthy sprinkle I know it's gonna sound like a maryland basic bitch healthy sprinkle, old bay, both sides, got healthy sprinkle. Then smear it all together and that's your sauce mustard, mayo, old bay, love it. Give it a try.

Eric:

People, and I specifically you yeah I know, I will absolutely give it a try.

Matt:

I would slather that on it just spices up a regular turkey cheese. Just a little bit. It gives you a little bit of I'm fancy, you know. Yeah, all right, so before we get into more questions, should we maybe hit a voicemail? We should Now. Eric, I don't know if you listened to this one yet. This is from our good friend Ian the Holy Mole. Ian.

Matt:

Who, on Instagram or threads, did tell us that he this is his words, you can look this up on the media that he was high when he sent this. Okay, you know, medically, I assume, uh, but maybe not. Uh, it doesn't. Who are we to judge?

Matt:

we don't care, oh, I certainly don't I think everybody knows what I'm talking about when I say elevated state. It's so, so anyway, um, he did say it might be hard to discern. I don't think it's because of the pot, I think it is. I think it is a connection issue. But hey, you sent this in.

Ian the Holy Mole:

Ian, we're playing it, my noble lords of thealand On reaching a hundred episodes. I am pleased to inform you to have received a congratulatory call from King Arl Simsel, presented by his emissary, the noble ian couldn't agree more, thank you very much for the message too.

Matt:

True, my friend I can't say it enough this man's a philosopher yes a I this man needs to be running parliament.

Eric:

This.

Matt:

This man is the thinking man's renaissance man the fuck does that mean the thinking man's renaissance? Man isn't a renaissance man, a thinking man ah well, if you have to ask.

Eric:

But I will say this do not, do not let this recording, do not let that dissuade you. Go listen to the strange mole show. His recording is top-notch. The jokes are fucking hilarious and it scratches like every monty python, terry pratchett, douglas adams, like sketch benny hill sketch comedy.

Matt:

Yeah, brilliant itch also and while listening to it, I do legitimately learn more about British politics than than I know now Like you actually get so much out of his show and it's brilliant.

Eric:

Please listen to it.

Matt:

Yeah, it's scripted, it's sketch comedy. He they have seasons, him and doc, strange they, you know they put it all together so well. We taught Ian was on the show in episode 60. So we're due for a child king. I believe is the name of that episode yes, uh so go check that out if you want to hear ian. He's great. Um, and you know ian. Sorry about the voicemail. Uh, you know when, when sound waves travel across the pond, sometimes I get muddled in it in in it don't really apply to this sentence now, does it?

Eric:

in it. Uh, also one last plug for ian. Uh, if you find him on instagram, he runs a business where he he creates custom made, uh, mobility aids for people that are fantasy, sci-fi, really whatever you want themed like if, if you've, if you need a mobility aid and you've always wanted a steampunk or ray gun or dinosaur or fallout fallout themed. They're really cool and, honestly, that's just the nicest business I've ever heard of is just making really awesome, kick-ass mobility aids for people.

Matt:

Yeah, so give them a check and his website, for that is genxscouk, that's G-E-N-X-C-E-S-Scouk. Go check it out, ian. Cheers my friend, cheers buddy.

Eric:

My turn for a question.

Matt:

It is. We do have that secret bit.

Eric:

Oh, is it time for secret bit it could be.

Matt:

Could be time for secret bit. It could be jumping the gun slightly, but the British is a good segue.

Eric:

Okay, okay, oh, are you fucking with me right now?

Matt:

no, I'm not okay. So okay, well, because okay. So this is a new bit, this is a new segment, debuting it right here in the middle.

Eric:

Eric hit it new segment there you go oh man, it was almost reflexive. You did you watch my brain, my eyes going. I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing, but my mouth just start moving. Yes, that's literally what happened?

Matt:

He was looking at me with the eyes. That's. This is why I wanted to record upstairs, because we don't have a good camera angle for where we're recording Upstairs, where we put that photo on Instagram, that photo of us in those chairs. That's where I wanted to record this, so we could also do video. But I've got a tall ceiling. It's very echoey, so you can't see the fact that Eric was speaking. But looking at me with a. Is this what you wanted?

Eric:

My body cried action, but my eyes cried line Line, yes.

Matt:

So recently in my eyes cried line Line yes. So recently in my anglification, you know, first it was no longer calling the sports soccer and calling it football, and then it was spending every weekend watching soccer all the time and just in general. Growing up being obsessed with the Monty Pythons of the world and the Fawlty Towers and everything else God, I love Fawlty Towers All these things have led me to my current English fascination, which is the show Taskmaster. Welcome aboard, my friend. I'm watching it from the beginning. I'm very much enjoying it and, as all great comedians do not to suggest that I am a comedian, let alone a great one I'm going to steal one of their bits. Got to, got to Credit where credit is due. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I'm stealing a bit, but for our purposes, because we could do this multiple ways, I'm going to call this bit Special Delivery. Okay, eric, this multiple ways. Um, I'm gonna call this bit special delivery, okay, eric. Um, yeah, right now we're recording. It's like 2, 30 we haven't had lunch.

Matt:

No, are you interested in?

Eric:

lunch. I would love lunch all right um, I'm thinking pizza okay, would be good, yeah, I would love, so I would destroy a pizza eric, and so by the end, so by the end of the episode I say we order a pizza now.

Matt:

Okay, by the end of this episode it arrives and we enjoy some pizza. Post-show.

Eric:

That legitimately sounds baller. Yes, yes.

Matt:

Give me, give me, give me. Let me get some information from you, Eric.

Eric:

Yeah.

Matt:

I think you and I come on we need an extra large right XL baby.

Eric:

XL. What kind of no idea if we're actually ordering a pizza what kind of toppings do you like on your pizza? I will fucks with pepperoni pepper bacon I sorry if this is controversial. Love pineapple on my pizza. I understand if other people do not it is controversial, of course uh, do you love onion on my pizza?

Matt:

oh, if I'm eating this pizza, I draw the line at onion yeah, that's, perfectly pineapple I'll fuck with. Okay, okay, but no, I know I scratch the onion.

Eric:

My. My line in the sand is black olives on a pizza. No, I don't want to be disgusting.

Matt:

I, you know something, it's always the thing. I've tried it once, yeah, once, once. Noted my Grammy loves anchovies on her pizza hey the Ninja Turtles warned me against it and I haven't fucked with it, you should hate them. I haven't fucked with it since. Absolutely. Where are you on like a stuffed crust situation Depends yeah.

Eric:

In many ways like a credo of pizza in general is that quantity is a quality all its own. But with stuffed crust. I gotta have that quality. I've had some shitty stuffed crust and it can ruin a perfect because I love the crust of a pizza.

Matt:

Yeah.

Eric:

But I will fucks with stuffed crust, provided it comes correct.

Matt:

How do you feel about like sausage? I mean, because right now you got pepperoni, bacon, pineapple, love sausage Sausageage and maybe some like green peppers. Maybe, I don't know, it fucks with green peppers or just peppers.

Eric:

Banana peppers love.

Matt:

Yeah, how do you feel about like a chicken ranch situation? Yes, because I love a chicken bacon ranch pizza.

Eric:

I love a chicken bacon ranch pizza.

Matt:

Now, I don't know about ranch introducing that to this whole arrangement, because right now we've formed a pizza that's extra large pepper.

Eric:

Are you putting all of these on pepperoni bacon, pineapple sausage green peppers.

Matt:

Okay, yeah, do you want to try that with me? I would absolutely try that with you. Great, because you're going to place an order okay okay, now here's what I'm gonna before you call If this wasn't clear already, eric, this is a game. Oh, okay, so with any good game there comes rules. Oh, I'm sure. So what you're going to order is an extra large pizza with pepperoni, bacon, sausage, pineapple, green peppers. Okay, there's a couple words you can't say. Okay, peppers.

Matt:

okay, there's a couple words you can't say okay, those words are extra large pizza, pepperoni, bacon, pineapple sausage, green peppers, and you're gonna order this now and I'll come by the end of the show and so I'm gonna give you yeah I'm gonna give you I haven't made up a score. Let's say you get five points per correct thing that shows up. Those things show up correctly. Everything gets you five points. Okay, in my pocket here, annoyingly going off, I have the buzzer from the game taboo that is what.

Eric:

Okay, I've been wondering where the fuck that has been coming from, because it's been happening at regular, irregular intervals.

Matt:

I know, and I was troubleshooting things that kept going off in my pocket and I was so pissed because it ruined this moment. So I have the buzzer from the board game. Taboo. If I hear you on the phone say these things, you get a buzz. Okay, and that is going to be minus the two points. Okay, in the interest of fairness, right, uh, to everyone in the world, the person you're going to call. We're not going to record them, but I am going to have a helpful friend of the show record the lines in its place.

Eric:

Are we putting like a true crime?

Matt:

reenactment we're gonna reenact the other side of the phone. Sorry a true bit reenactment true bit, reenactment, so the other side of the phone call does not have to be recorded and no one can send us to jail I like it. Yeah, I get pizza and I don't go to jail just to be clear, this person was not recorded for the show and it has been replaced by a surprise friend of the show. Okay, all right, eric, are you ready to place our order?

Eric:

I am ready and babes, I cannot stress enough that I'm gonna give it to you one. I'm giving to you one last time this is the first time I'm learning of this bit this is all fresh.

Matt:

Yep, yep, extra, the words you cannot say but must convey. Okay, extra large pizza, yeah, pepperoni. Yeah, bacon, yeah, sausage, pineapple and green peppers. Yeah, I've got the buzzer at the ready. Okay.

Eric:

Place the call here we go.

Dr. Lindsey R. Barr:

Thank you for calling Unnamed Pizza Place. This is Lindsay. How can I help you?

Eric:

Thank you for calling Unnamed Pizza Place. This is Lindsay. How can I help you, hi? Yeah, I'd like to place an order. Sure, what's the name? That's. Eric. Okay, eric, what would you like to order? Yeah, I'd love a pizza for delivery. So what are my size options? 12, 14, 16, and 20.

Eric:

Can I get that 16 inch With cheese? Yes, please. Okay, so I was gonna get some meat options. I was going to. So what they asked me for. They said they were like we want all of the meats except ham and chicken. So like that would be, what would that be? Meat pizza no ham.

Eric:

Well, like, yeah, so like it would be the discs, like the little grease cups, the like. You know what I mean. Like the pig meat I'm sorry, Like it's been a long day I'm struggling to remember the names of things right now. So you want what Like a deli meat. No, not all, so I think you were onto it earlier. So like a meat pizza, just with no chicken or ham.

Dr. Lindsey R. Barr:

Okay, got it Two pizzas right. This will be one pizza, one pizza, okay, is that it?

Eric:

Yeah, and I was going to add some more stuff to that, some more stuff to that. Yeah, okay, go ahead. The uh. What babe? What's that? What's that? What's that fruit, um, that they put on? You know, like I huh pineapple, yeah, that one, and I think they're. They said some kind of uh, it's a vegetable, uh, it's like what is it called? We have mushroom green pepper black olive. The second one yeah, green pepper. Yeah. Okay, is that everything? And that's it. Okay, that should be about 30, 45 minutes okay.

Eric:

Thank you so much, that's perfect. Okay, thanks, have a great day you too. Bye-bye. Bye Eric, I am a god.

Matt:

Eric, I am impressed. Now I will say you've taken a bit of a gamble with your points.

Eric:

Oh, I know.

Matt:

Because we didn't get a specific confirmation that pepperoni and bacon and sausage will be there. We got to pray. We got to pray. You got her to say green peppers Yep, you got fucking lucky with pineapple.

Dr. Lindsey R. Barr:

You got fucking lucky with pineapple, my guy, yeah, I fucking did.

Matt:

Now I have a question about the size. She gave you a 20 inch. You chose 16.

Eric:

Yeah, because typically I know a 12 is going to be small, a 14 is going to be medium. Oh, you see what happened.

Matt:

Son of a bitch. You see, what you've done.

Eric:

Typically, 16 is the XL. I'm going off of domino sizing scale, but there's another size but there's another size, there's another size.

Matt:

So there's. I believe she gave you four sizes and you chose the third size. We're going to be. We're going to be taking this to the receipt. So that will take it to the receipt. If it says extra large, you get it. If it doesn't, you don't know.

Eric:

I agree with that, you get a and you don't know, I I agree with that. You get a, and you did start off by saying pizza.

Matt:

I know right out the gate. Uh and again, special thanks to dr lindsey arbor for uh putting in the uh the voice over uh recreation. Again, we did not use or record the innocent bystanders voice. This is a dramatic, dramatic uh reenactment of what could have been said.

Eric:

Of a very real conversation.

Matt:

Of a real conversation that we did record Eric's half of yes, so that was live. But, eric, should we get back into it?

Eric:

We should get back into it.

Matt:

Whose question is it? It's mine. Oh, go for it.

Eric:

So, mine really no it's my turn to ask you a question. Yes, yes, yes. So your last question what was my perfect sandwich? Yes, this ties to one of my questions. Matt, I go into a bar. Uh-huh. I sit down and I look at the bartender and I order a Matt Shea.

Matt:

Tell me how to make it. Ooh, that's interesting, Eric.

Eric:

I'm going to say hmm Well, my go-to cocktail is usually a Manhattan, which I'm currently sipping. Thank you, very much.

Matt:

Yes, which? A Manhattan or an old fashioned or some sort of whiskey drink generally, I don't really discriminate though. I'll do a vodka drink, I'll do a tonic drink, okay, uh, I was just getting a little chumbawumba action into the situation there, but anyway, um, hmm, I mean just a matt hatton a matt hatton.

Eric:

Matt hatton, now, what makes this different from a manhattan? You, son of a bitch.

Matt:

Yeah, you gotta. You gotta judge it. I would use Irish whiskey, as opposed to the general Canadian, or rye, which is generally what's used in a Manhattan Typically, or bourbon, which is what's in ours. We've got makers in ours, but I'm not afraid to throw some Jameson in Manhattan and in Matt-hattan it's required.

Eric:

Okay.

Matt:

Yeah.

Eric:

Yeah, any other little. So I know Manhattan's typically going to be your whiskey.

Matt:

Yeah, so you got, let's go with Jameson.

Eric:

Yep.

Matt:

We've got to have Martini Vermouth the name brand, only sweet vermouth and a little of the bitters in there and bing bang, boom gives yourself a cherry and you're good.

Eric:

Thank you.

Matt:

You're welcome.

Eric:

To you sir.

Matt:

I raise my welcome to you, sir. I raised my mat, my matthatten. I raised my now empty man matthatten glass to you, sir, and I'm gonna ask you a question now, if that's all right with you hit me with it. What's your favorite place?

Eric:

oh, my favorite place on this earth is, uh, the shenandoah river river, because yearly I have a canoe trip that I take with friends where we spend two days paddling 25, 26 miles, yeah, of the shenandoah river. That's nice. It is one of the most beautiful places on earth. I am usually quite elevated, sure got to win when we're we're and we spend two days listening to music, eating food like making food for each other eating it on the river, doing river bits, swimming, paddling.

Matt:

Let me tell you this yeah, lindsey and I have these inflatable kayaks that we got to, um, or inflatable kayak, it's a two-person inflatable kayak that we got to. I think I told the story on the podcast where my dad fell in the pond, or maybe I just told you, but anyway, my dad fell in this lake on vacation. We had these things, we had to fish them out. Anyway, we got the kayaks to kayak around this very specific location and we're like, okay, if we're going to buy it, we got to go kay kayaking and we have yet to actually do that. But, eric, I the idea of doing river bits with you, bro. I want to drive our significant others up a wall I, I want to be insufferable are you in this canoe, this kayak with alissa?

Matt:

no, we actually, or it's all vintage.

Eric:

Each year people will pair up differently. You can also solo kayak. Are you renting these, then You're renting them from the Downriver Canoe Company, which is a wonderful company to rent from.

Matt:

I'd love to do this at some point with you.

Eric:

I would do. If I could do this every weekend of my life, I would Well, eric, we're on the river right now.

Matt:

Yeah, give me a river bit.

Eric:

Let me tell you I'll share one with you that happened this past year. Oh, okay, I'm paddling. We're going around, just around the river bend. As we're coming around the bend ahead of me, we're in the sort of valley of the Shenandoah, so there's just trees stretching up on mountains to either side of me and like there's more mountain, more trees. It is like it is just raw, primal river nature. Yeah, and it is the sun. It is bright, sunny day, it is gorgeous. My friend Patrick, who is a gold record selling musician, who is toured with Dan Deacon. He brings every year with him on the river a trumpet. No, come on. And he stood up and, mind you, he was dressed because it was Sunday, we were all dressed as if we were going to church, river bits, sure, he was in a full suit vest. His wife was in a lacy dress and had a parasol.

Matt:

So dumb.

Eric:

People were baffled by it. He stands up and there we're in our own group and like, ahead and behind us there are other like paddling groups going down the Shannon Golly and behind us there are other like paddling groups going down the shannon golly. So while this is happening and we're going through this like perfectly, aesthetic curvature river he stands up and starts playing, just starts playing jurassic park amazing.

Eric:

And just when he hit it, it was the I I like had a tear in my eye because it's just like the sun hitting everyone. It felt like we were canoeing down river in jurassic park. That's amazing. And when he finished he got a standing ovation from both groups, ahead and behind of us.

Matt:

Nice Sitting ovation. Sitting ovation, but an ovation nonetheless.

Eric:

It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. The Shenandoah River is my favorite place on earth. Amazing yeah.

Matt:

Amazing. Yeah, wow, yeah, I've learned something about you.

Eric:

Yeah, let's learn something about you. Let's. Okay. Matt. Yeah, what is the most incorrect assumption that people make about you? Hmm, something that most people would probably assume about you or have assumed about you, and what and what it it like?

Matt:

that is not correct I think that sometimes in a um, in a group of people and like that don't know me super well yeah you know, with sort of my public facing persona sometimes, which we all have, which we all have, I think there's a certain level of I don't know confidence, bravado, like, like I do bits, I make jokes, we love a bit I'm doing all this stuff. I think it can be very easy to assume that if somebody's like taking the piss out of me or something that like nothing phases me, like I'm good to roll with all the punches you know what I mean and that I don't go home and in my car go, but why'd they?

Matt:

say that and think about it as you fall asleep.

Eric:

What they?

Matt:

mean by that? It's been 15 years and I'm still wondering. I'm serious, though.

Eric:

Yeah, no, you were someone who you take everything to heart.

Matt:

There's a. This is I'll tell you two quick, two quick college tales, okay, the first being there was somebody we went to college with that I won't name, who did impressions of other people in the department, and once I was coming around the corner, people were hanging in the hallway and before I saw him, I heard him and I realized he was doing me my nightmare. You were living my nightmare and literally I'll say this if you know who it is, if you know who you are my nightmare. And literally I'll tell it, I'll say this if you know who it is, if you know who you are, it was a great impression. So he was, he was doing the uh, he was doing the match.

Matt:

A do the match a now people were laughing and I I could acknowledge in my brain, like that's good, that, like that's a good match, and I know he's doing me. I don't need confirmation which speaks to how good it was. That's what I mean. I was like that fucker's doing me and before I rounded the corner I just like listened, listen to what people were laughing at and had a moment of like shit, I do do that, don't I like?

Matt:

He like hit my mannerisms, he hit all these different things. And then I switched on public facing match a because I rounded the corner and just I like spread, like, spread out real wide and just like a like a sheriff at Main Street in the old Wild West, I knew I just came around the corner and like dead-eyed him and I went well, well, well and like everyone had a good laugh. But I was thinking about that impression. And my second quick college story is I had a terrible relationship with my first freshman year roommate. Oh, I remember we, we, we butted heads I thought that was gonna come to blows.

Matt:

I tried to get a point it got to the point that I and this is the the story he had this fucking dehumidifier in his in our room. Our room was tiny yeah, it was a tiny dorm room and in an old building which has now been gutted and re-renovated to be our uh the like medical facility on campus, but at the time.

Matt:

Thank god mercy killed that fucking thing, literally the walls and that's it. Everything inside was gutted. Yeah, but like, so, like my where my dorm room was, where the scene of this crime took place, is now like a person's desk. But but like we were there, I, I, he said something like you gotta stop touching my dehumidifier. I was like, yeah, I'm not gonna. It's loud and it doesn't need to be on because it's not humid in here, and he went off. He, like we went back and forth and I said to him I was like fuck you, man, I'm not gonna do that. Like blah, blah, blah. It doesn't matter what I said. What was key was I said fuck you. And he responded by saying you just really. You just told me to fuck off and I was washing my hands. I'll never forget this. I turned around while drying my hands and I said no, what I said was fuck you. And Eric.

Matt:

I live for that. He began a tirade that he was like man, listen, I fucking hate you, I hate your fucking sarcasm, I hate. And Eric, I don't remember anything after that because all I was doing was like in my head I went wow, sarcasm was number one so that's what, that's what.

Eric:

So I was like damn, that's that's I was like damn.

Matt:

I was like damn. I am sarcastic but honest.

Eric:

Bless you for even having the self-awareness to like acknowledge that, because you see the the pattern I'm recognizing is you're stopping, you're hearing what's happening, you're going. Oh, so that is how I'm being that's how I'm perceived that is and like and like. Okay, reflecting on this, yeah, yeah, yeah. Internal, Okay Now, obviously being a dear dear friend of yours since college. Yes, I see you beat yourself up way too much over a lot of stuff.

Matt:

If my wife were here she'd agree with you.

Eric:

But the self-reflection is important. Just don't.

Matt:

Because I did apologize for not figuring out how we needed to overcome a somewhat foreseeable audio problem. Pre-show probably about 35 times 35 times.

Eric:

Matt, literally on his knees, go after having sat through like audio hell for the first half hour. He's like I dude, I am so sorry. I'm like matt they. I'm like I was sitting here sipping whiskey and reading a book on my kindle the entire time he was doing this. Yeah, yeah, he's. He's an angel. Oh, he will, he will, he will, he will be, he will be. I could be sitting on the back of our tax as matt is pulling us through the swamp of sadness and matt will be apologizing to me.

Matt:

For the swamp, for the swamp, for the fault of the swamp.

Eric:

For the fault of the swamp you apologize for so much that you never have to apologize for you. Sweetheart, you, you, angel, ask me a question, you beautiful bitch.

Matt:

All right, fine, I will. What is it that you love so goddamn much? No, no, I'm gonna rephrase rephrase tell me the moment you fell in love with dungeons and dragons oh, dude.

Eric:

so I started playing and it was from the moment. It was from the moment we began, because I started playing Dungeons Dragons when I was 11 years old and I started playing because we went to I believe it was a Rundle Mills when they first opened up, when I was like 11. Sure, sure, for those not in the know, rundle Mills is a mall and they had a Wizards of the coast store back when. That was a thing where they would sell this.

Eric:

This was like the progenitor of, like the, the your friendly local game store where they would sell wizards of the coast, board games, products like magic cards, all the stuff which included, because wizards owns hasbro, hasbro owns wizards. What have you, what have you? What have you? Dungeons and Dragons there was a starter kit and we saw Dungeons and Dragons. I had heard vaguely of Dungeons and Dragons, but this is when my dad told me he's like, oh yeah, he's like. I used to play Dungeons and Dragons so much when I was a kid and he'd tell me stories about these adventures and stuff. You'd go on. So my dad, my parents, bought me this Dungeons Dragons starter set. It came with basic rules. It was third edition. Third edition not 3.5.

Eric:

So for those of you following along, at home I had a rough start because 3 had some kinks to iron out. But how it started was my dad volunteering to dungeon master for me and my cousin just the two of us. My cousin was also 11, so it was my dad who would have been honest to God, my age now I'm 34. He would have been about 35, 36. I'm 34. He would have been like 35, 36. Him, my cousin, would come over to spend the night at our house for the weekend and me, him and my dad would play Dungeons and Dragons for the weekend. We'd spend all day running through these pre-module adventures. I'll never forget the very first. One of the very first adventures that that box set takes you through is you're trying to rescue a unicorn and gave you a little dungeon map and pre-populated character sheets that we got to select through.

Eric:

I believe I was a dwarf cleric. I think my cousin, tommy, was a human fighter and my dad, to kind of balance things out, gave us a third care that we kind of like co-controlled. It was a rogue named Kerwin. Wow, and I'll never forget Kerwin. You remember the name. Yeah, well, cause Kerwin was really good at finding traps. Okay, and what I mean is he wasn't. He had the skills as a rogue to detect traps and disarm them and such. We did not have that level of understanding of the game yet. Yeah, kerwin was good at finding traps because we would always send him first into every single room. Smart, just shove him in there, find the trap.

Eric:

But my, what made me fall in love with D&D is I get my kindness and my desire to help others from my mom. I get my voracious reading and storytelling and my sense of humor from my dad. So I got to see on the weekends. When I was 11 years old in middle school I got to hang out with my dad on the weekend and listen to him telling these stories, just reading out of an adventure module, but like it was. It was like I was getting read stories too by my dad and then dad was also having helping me go on these adventures where I'd get to like save the day and stuff and it was like it's very sweet. That's why. That's why I'm a lifelong DM too. I love giving that to people.

Matt:

I love I was like let's let's make a really cool story together. The answer I expected I don't know what I expected, but there wasn't. That that was very like. How about that? Core memory of my childhood I would think uh, should we maybe voicemail before we continue, let's take a voicemail.

Dr. Lindsey R. Barr:

Hello, this is Dr Lindsay, famously from this correction corner, calling just to wish you a happy 100. And I hope there are 100 more at least, if not more than that you get what I'm saying. I don't have any corrections presently that I'm prepared to share with everyone, but know that they are coming. I'm hopeful that in the next batch of 100, there are many more conversations about how you all are wrong to come as well. Okay, Love you both. Bye.

Eric:

So welcome to the 100th episode of you Daft as featured on Dr Lindsay Barr's Correction Corner Absolutely.

Matt:

Yes, yes, thank you.

Eric:

Sorry, wait Now would that make. Okay, that makes Lindsay's Correction Corner cheers, which makes us Frasier, Frasier.

Matt:

Hell yeah, hell yeah, eric, hell yeah, yeah, eric yeah.

Eric:

Yeah, yeah, I'll take it. I'll take it oh. God, I love Frazier Lindsay. Dr Lindsay Barr. Yes. Thank you, absolutely, your best she's.

Matt:

Obviously she's not present in the home at this time. No, but yes.

Eric:

Keep us honest, lindsay, here's to keeping us honest for another hundred episodes. Cheers to that, cheers to that. Cheers to that, my friend.

Matt:

You see what I've done. Yeah, that was very good. Thank you, all right. Well, no pizza yet, so I think we keep rolling. Okay, let's see, I think it is. Oh yeah, it is your question, yeah.

Eric:

Here's a great one. This is the one question I had help with. Alyssa suggested this question and I was like perfect, I'm kind of mad because it's really good. Is there something you've learned about yourself on this journey of doing this podcast, and is there something you've learned about me?

Matt:

Wow, eric, this is is a good question this is a very good question.

Matt:

Thank you, alissa something I've learned about myself, something I've learned about you. Yeah, no. Next question no, no, no, no, no, no, I think I Well, I'll say this I've learned through editing I've sort of gotten rid of you know how the thing, especially I feel like, especially for performers people don't like hearing the sound of their voice. Yes, I like hearing. Now, as any good performer who becomes a podcaster I would say guilty as charged of anyone who says loves hearing myself talk, but hearing it back was something I always had a problem with, hearing my voice nails on a chalkboard, and two things can be true, right.

Eric:

I can acknowledge that I am a good performer. I have a good voice.

Matt:

I like like, yeah, I like how it sounds in my head, yeah, and then when I hear it back, I want to die. I that's not how I hear, that's not how it sounds to me.

Eric:

No, don't have those skull acoustics don't have them skull, don't have that, that rich bass that I'm always with boom boom.

Matt:

So I will say I've not only learned to listen to myself through editing and whatnot, I've also learned how others are hearing me and think about that on stage and other places subconsciously, like I know I I've been able to train my voice. Here comes the pizza to uh say like um moment of truth.

Eric:

Moment of truth he's going to the door. I cannot face the pizza person. I I did give them a nice tip though. Hi, how are you? How are you good? Thank you very much. Look, uh, kids, friendly reminder if you're going to do a bit with your pizza delivery. Hi, how are you? I'm good, how are you Good? Thank you very much. Thank you, look, kids, friendly reminder if you're going to do a bit with your pizza delivery person, tip well, thank you so much. Tip well, eric, look at that pie. Eric, look at that pie.

Matt:

I asked the man for the receipt Good man, what does it say, eric? It says right here at the top, 16 inch extra large.

Eric:

Yes, god, yes yes.

Matt:

Eric, you get the points. Let's take a look at this thing.

Eric:

Yeah, let's crack it. We'll come back to this question.

Matt:

Well, this was supposed to be the end of the episode.

Eric:

Yes, this closing bit. Oh, this was supposed to be the end of the episode. Yes, this closing bit.

Matt:

Oh, this is true, but like fuck it, it's here now.

Eric:

It's here now. They came faster than they promised. Yeah, yeah, yeah, matt, what do you see on that pie?

Matt:

All right, so I'm going to take a picture here too. It'll be on the Instagram. Ok, I see pineapple. Okay, I see sausage. Definitely see sausage, sausage, pepperoni, pepperoni.

Eric:

I think that's Matt. Do it like you're on CSI, like lean up, put your finger.

Matt:

Yeah that's right. Give it a little. I need to know if, is that?

Eric:

bacon or.

Matt:

That's bacon, baby Derek. You did it, did, I nail it. You got them all. Yes. Everything's there, happy hundo babe. Everything's there, eric, you fucking nailed it.

Eric:

What a good A. Also, now that I've won or now that I've done a good job, I could say great bit, great, great segment, great segment. Thank you, I'm putting that on the floor. Thank you, taskmaster. Yes, thank you, thank you. Oh, we love a floor pizza yeah, so that's in its box.

Matt:

It's sitting over there um back to the interview back to the interview also.

Eric:

I just kind of had a little mini revelation about our show. Our show is like floor pizza, tell me, sometimes you're walking through life you see a pizza box on the floor. Now, 99 million times out of 100 million, you know that pizza box is empty 100%, but our show is the one time you go know what could?

Matt:

hurt so next bitch open, there's pizza next, next time we do special delivery, it'll be me I'm making I love it.

Eric:

It'll be me. I love this doesn't have to be pizza it could be oh yeah, oh, I look forward to figuring out a good food for you all right so what was I saying? So you were talking about how this uh allowing you to hear your own voice repeatedly and incorporate that into your work as an actor.

Matt:

Just to thesis, sum it up, it, I think, has made me realize, as a performer, what I subconsciously even have to change to make bits, make jokes, make timing sound the way I want it to to an audience.

Eric:

Yeah, you know, it's like a little subconscious tweak's like and you, daft, gave me that fuck yeah, dude, it's like exposure therapy, it's, and it's like you can't grow without some amount of discomfort and hearing yourself like because, like originally, when we first started this, I was editing episodes you've been editing our episodes way longer than I ever did you edited, I think, the first 21 episodes I'm pretty sure, and then I, I took over and you're a fuck.

Eric:

You're way better at it than I ever was. Um, thank you, but like in a similar vein that I definitely had to grapple with that shit too. It's like it.

Matt:

It it forces you to become really okay with hearing the sound of your own voice yeah, which, and, and not only that, but like mannerisms and things, like I've learned I do that shit a lot and try to cut back in my actual life. Like I'll be talking to lindsey, we'll be, uh, I'll be. I'll do this weird restart thing that all the listeners know I do. Yeah, and I've tried. I've tried to do a hard, like if I catch myself doing it in real life, I'll be. Like what I'm trying to say is that, like, cut the stream of consciousness and get to it. Um, as for you, yeah, yeah.

Eric:

What have you learned about?

Matt:

me. I learned that you smack them lips a whole fucking lot. I truly do.

Eric:

I truly do. I hope it's gotten better since I started self-monitoring, but after a while it's all subconscious.

Matt:

I'm trying to think of something on a, on like a deeper level. Well, I'll say I've learned what I already knew, which is that doing this podcast has and like we started in 2020, yeah, but I don't like to think of it as a covid pandemic podcast. Lots of pandemic podcasts were born and have already died we're still going baby still chugging along. It's four years we've been doing the show. Four years, Eric, we've been doing the show. We could have put a kid through college in that time.

Matt:

All right, sure, I'm sure we could have With what money. We just started the Patreon Subscribe today. We don't have a single patron. Please join our.

Eric:

Patreon. That should be a goal. That should be like a very long-term goal. Let's get the patron, get it swollen so much that we can put a kid through college.

Matt:

The first patron is probably going to be Lindsay, which means I'm paying for my own Patreon. Hell yeah, hell yeah baby. So anyway, I think the podcast has been a really good way for us to get back to how we were in college. Oh my God, yeah, you know what I mean when we could just sit around, shoot the shit and have some questions as prompts.

Eric:

This show was born out of a very real energy that we cultivated in college, which was like our friendship was forged in, like those 2 am conversations. They happen in corners of parties, they happen in parking lots, they happen in dorm rooms after everyone else comes. They've happened as we are wandering about campus, just those. It's that time of night when you ask the questions that you really can't ask at any point throughout your day because you're busy with life, with work, with school, with shit. But it's like that. There's nothing else to be done today. There's nothing else but just two humans noodling about in the spaghetti of the universe we and Eric, we?

Matt:

I was going to cut this question. Okay, I have this question ready, so anyway, to put a pin on it, I would say I learned that, like through the like decade plus years from college on, I've learned that our chemistry and our friendship didn't fucking change. No, like it's sitting there, even though, like throughout those decades, there were like solid years where we didn't talk.

Eric:

No, yeah, we, it was when we just straight up lost touch.

Matt:

Yeah, but then we would. We had moments, like you know, you were in my wedding and all this stuff Like that came back. You did I cast you in a show at Single Carrot, so that stuff like that came back. You did, I cast you in a show at single carrot, so that came back. So there were moments, but like it wasn't, like it was in college, when we were just hanging out in the glen. There was. There were times where we'd go to hang out in your room and you'd be like. You'd be like, oh man, I'm fucking tired and you just take a nap and I'd do something else just hanging out, just fucking, just vibe, while I pass out for a little bit yeah, and so it was refreshing to know that, like it's never been, it's never, never gone down the cup has never drained.

Eric:

In fact, I would say our doing this podcast with you has only like I you're, you're one of my bestest friends in the whole wide world I fucking want. You don't want to know what one of my questions are. I got a little thought. Do you know how loved you are? Do you know how fucking loved you are?

Matt:

I think the honest answer to that, Eric, is no.

Eric:

And I will spend the rest of my life reminding you, you fucking asshole, how fucking loved you are. I love you, so You're going to make me cry. I'm already there. You're making me tear up. I love you so much. Lindsay loves you so much. Your friends love you so much.

Matt:

Eric, this right now too much, it's too much.

Eric:

I know.

Matt:

I'm going to get overwhelmed.

Eric:

I'm going to get verklempt. Oh sorry, it's just you sure there aren't onions on that pizza.

Matt:

There better not be. There better not be. I'll be upset. Uh, the, you know I wasn't gonna ask this question to get back to it to, but since we're talking about college, since we're talking about the good old days, yeah, what was your initial impression of me?

Matt:

my initial impression of you go ahead here is my initial impression of you having we we initially met yeah, and we talked about where we met and I believe I talked about like we met in auditions for the acting track at towson. I told you my initial impression to you.

Eric:

But I don't think, I, I realized, I don't think I ever got yours my, my first impression of you and and I don't think I realized, I don't think I ever got yours my my first impression of you and and let this be both a feather in your cap and a cross to bear and a testament to how far we have come.

Eric:

Ok. Ok. I was. My first impression of you can best be summarized as oh fuck, he's my Gary Oak. Gary, oh, that is my competition, that is my rival, that is my. That was like because you, you were charismatic, you fucking have oils like I. I came in I say this with love. I never felt when I say felt threatened, not physically or mentally, but like as actors to actors.

Eric:

You're the only person our year I ever felt threatened by. I was like oh man, we're gonna be competing for roles, we're gonna be goes like like this is.

Matt:

I was like we got, I I'm gonna. I take this as a giant compliment you, you truly. Like you like and you're right, we both, both, I mean, we competed for us throughout college, but none more famously, I think, than for Scottish play at the end yes for Mackers. We both auditioned for McBee.

Eric:

Yeah, yes, we did.

Matt:

I thought I got it was. There was a second callback and you were called back from McDuff and started reading McDuff and I wasn't involved in the second callback.

Eric:

Oh, so you were convinced that like oh, he's got it.

Matt:

I was convinced I didn't. I not only didn't, if I either didn't get cast or I got cast as like one of the smaller parts that didn't need an additional read because the people were called back, were like mcduffs and I think maybe lennox's and things like that, but like the um who went to former guest of the show, mike perry jr.

Eric:

By the way, hell yeah, mike perry but like the like.

Matt:

I don't think there were a lot of lady mBees and things like that and but I didn't know any of that. I just knew that there was a second callback and I wasn't on the list which is never.

Eric:

Never a good thought crosses your mind when that happens.

Matt:

Yeah, so I remember how I found out I was cast and I remember how, um I first found out I was cast and I remember how, um, I first thought I wasn't cast at all, but we both I remember us having a moment where, in the hallway of, like, let's not fight about it. Like, good luck to you truly.

Eric:

Oh my god, yes, I remember that, we, we, yeah, we had.

Matt:

I was like, no matter what happens, the right person got it well, there were other people involved in the casting equation for mcb and I remember you. I said to you and I do mean this to this day if anyone beat me for that part, you're the only person I would have been okay with. Hell. Yeah, you're the only person that I would have been like.

Eric:

I can see why, fucking same that I can see why they got it yeah, and that's that's what changed from the initial impression over the years. By by by mackers, it went from like it started as and I don't mean this in an aggressive like fuck you, wade, but it truly started as like I'm going to have to be he is my competition at every audition, because we are like definitely we're at that at that level together, but transformed into like truly a deep, deep appreciation for another actor who I was like it.

Eric:

It went from god I can't, I can't lose roles to this person to if it's not me it, better fucking it, better be him it better and that's how I feel, yeah, throughout the years.

Matt:

But and like, yeah, I know I got mcb, you got mcduff. But I am so glad that we ended up in a iteration of those two roles because oh my god, yes like when I think back to college, when I think about rehearsals and stuff. My favorite version of all that is you and me doing that fucking fight our.

Eric:

Our final fight from mackers is, to this day, my my favorite fight. It was so and the first.

Matt:

I remember I'm sure you do too. The first time we because when we do rehearsals for that, it was just us and lew Louis Shaw, the fight choreographer, the fight director, in the room, with the stage manager and the director. And then it wasn't until tech that other people saw the other people in the cast saw the fight and they gathered round like they were all around the perimeter.

Matt:

There was a moment where you had this big shield and came at me like Captain America, like trying to slam my skull open with it, and I, lewis, gave me this badass fucking catch. I caught it with my hand, I spun you around and then I threw the shield.

Zack Deuce:

Yes.

Matt:

And I threw it like offstage into the wings, but in the room I just threw it, or I always threw wings, but in the room I just threw, or I always threw it. And it's at the feet of steve baroga, one of our dear friends, dear friends, and I remember steve looked down where I threw it and looked back up at me and he I could see on his face that he was thinking this is so fucking cool and I just I love that fight it was so that fight there and it was a workout.

Eric:

Oh, it was god. We were fucking after, especially for you, because this fight is happening.

Matt:

Yeah, you cut off my head.

Eric:

I've had a few scenes throughout the play at this point. Yeah, you have been on stage pretty much the entire time yeah and then you have for like two hours, yeah, and then you have to fight yeah, and it and you.

Matt:

I had chosen to direct in the spring of senior year. You did not, so you were in another show. Mcbee was my last towowson University performance. Holy shit, it was, it was. And like I knew that, obviously going in, I had already decided to direct. And so when we got off stage, when you caught off my head and I did the magic because we had a dummy Matt Shea with a dummy head- yeah, it was very well done.

Eric:

It was cast from your head.

Matt:

And there was actually two. There was the one that came off in the moment, and then you came in with another one that was full of blood one I had to gang.

Eric:

I had to hold the head upside down. It was basically a vase with a like the head was a vase and the neck hole was the top of the vase and they filled with blood and I would just walk out as I'm walking, I'd flip it over and just waterfall of blood. It always got a gasp it always got a oh. And I held it aloft. Look where stands the usurper's cursed head.

Matt:

Yeah, and we had these witches. We incorporated. The witches just so happened to be able to flaunt their capes in such a fashion that I was able to spin around to one of the two pillars on stage, which was hollow, and disappear and they would shove out my body from underneath the stage. And I remember getting in that pillar and being like for that last time, the last show, and being like that was it, like I just capstoned my Towson acting career. Now that would actually happen again because we were chosen to do the show at KCACTF. So we remounted the show in Pennsylvania weeks later or months later really. And but that first moment of me being like wow, I remember getting off stage and you and I had a moment of like I'm so glad it was with you. Yes, god it, we were. And we started together in that audition room viewing each other as competition and me being very wrong Because you made this joke just to catch everyone up who skipped this episode.

Matt:

You made this joke about being like so do we bribe you now or later To Steve Sada who would direct McPhee? So you made this joke and I remember thinking like I got this shit in the bag, put me in now put me in this program now. But like then, first day, first day of school, we show up. You're the first person I ran into and I saw you and I was like I remember that guy from auditions and we've been attached to the hip ever since. Yeah, we have buddy man. I saw you and I was like I remember that guy from auditions and we've been attached to the hip ever since.

Matt:

Yeah we have buddy man I love you, bud, I fucking love you, and you know what eric do, how many you got other questions you want to ask. I got others that I don't need to we can also ask later. Yeah, I think I think that's a button on it. I think that's a button. But I know, eric, that we have a very special. Uh, it's not even a voicemail. We got an. We got an email from zach deuce with a?

Matt:

d with an attached um voicemail with the attachment for me with the attachment for us, eric, okay, so uh, let's go ahead and listen to this audio file.

Eric:

So full disclosure. The other messages we've got, we previewed a little bit, or we were given. Well, they just came into the thought line. Yeah, they came into the thought line, so we would see the transcript.

Matt:

Except for you, ian, there was no, there's no transcripting that.

Eric:

But uh, zach gave explicit instructions for us to wait until we were sitting down together and recording the episode to play his voicemail. So neither.

Matt:

So exactly put it at the end this better be good um. Er you ready? I am ready, brother.

Zack Deuce:

Oh, hold on, Is this thing on? Oh, feedback. Anyways, matthew Shea, eric Poach, it's Zach from the Neatcast, occasionally from FN Cultured and the probably works network with all the fun podcasting stuff I do over there. I wanted to say, hey, congratulations guys, a hundred episodes it's not easy.

Zack Deuce:

We know it's not easy creating content but also being as creative and funny and entertaining as you guys are. I don't know what that's like, but I know what it is like to listen to that. And that's you two every couple weeks, Except for those weird ones where we get that kind of bonus where we get like two or three weeks in a row of you daft. Oh, that's like Christmas, man, I love what you guys do. You're amazing. You're incredible people.

Zack Deuce:

I'm very blessed to have gotten to know you guys remotely, obviously through the podcasting networks that we have, but also maybe someday we'll be able to meet in person. You never know when that may happen. Yes, ominous music right here. There's a lot of favorite things you guys have covered, from your humble beginnings of where a centaur will go to the bathroom. You know Christmas pickles and Google gripes. Also, of course, the mascot bracket that you guys did, which questionable Certain parts of it. Certain ways people were eliminated. They were questionable, but besides that, you guys are both loved and adored. Just keep doing what you're doing. We look forward to it. We love you. Thank you very much. I do want to take a moment and go through some of my personal favorite titles that you guys have put out there, because you know it's just amazing. I would like to highlight the, the comedic genius that is, the titles of yadaf are you fucking kidding me right now scrapple virgin.

Zack Deuce:

Episode three mayo gate, you gotta have that Christmas pickle. Radicalized Dolphins, schrodinger's Hatchback, flamboyant Versification. Do you even chuck bro, pouch me, mama Booty Scoots Sell out cash in Grippable skull, the long, dark ball pit of the soul. Classic Humpty Dumpty's bumpy dumpy. My favorite Truck, nuts, rides you and Steve lists in Seattle.

Zack Deuce:

Also instant Again thank you very much for your contribution to uh, creating content being funny, giving us something to look forward to every couple of weeks. You are both a treasure and may you forever continue podcasting. As I leave, I just want to know how you guys have scored in the game. Anyways, bye-bye.

Eric:

Wow, there was more production value in that clip.

Matt:

Than our whole show Than our whole Zach.

Eric:

What, hey? He's the radio professional I didn't know. There was a section of my serotonin receptors labeled Zach Deuce reading off episode titles of my show to an epic music score. I'm going to be chasing that dragon for the rest of my life. 100% gonna be chasing that dragon for the rest of my life, a hundred percent. Um, and I, personally, yeah, I there are so many words that I want to or could to say to try to convey all the feelings I'm feeling right now after listening to that incredibly kind thing that he just did for us and funny thing that he just did for us. It boils down to this Matt, yeah, may we spend the next 100 episodes being the podcast that Zachy Deuce knows we can be.

Matt:

Amen brother, fuck yeah, fuck yeah.

Eric:

God, that was funny.

Matt:

Jesus Christ, that was funny. I'm a little speechless was I'm a little speechless. I am a little speechless about it. Floored eric, I think god damn that was good. I got other shit, you got other shit.

Matt:

I say we can get back to it on a bonus episode potentially or the next time we want to do personal questions, yeah, so we'll save those, because I think that's what better way to end. We nailed it, we nailed it so, uh, well, I think that'll be. I'll do it for the 100th episode of you didn't ask for this. I'm so glad we did this in person. I'm like this. This felt so nice. This has been such a delight. This is great to just be talking and not be talking into a zoom camera and having another screen distracting me. I'm just looking at your fucking tall ass body. God, look at your beautiful ass.

Eric:

God, little gritsy, little grippers curling, yeah, damn, you got some it's just tension.

Matt:

It's just toe tension. Yeah, it's just me and anxiety rocking and vibing. It's working for me.

Matt:

Thanks, it's probably. I'm probably gonna get carpal tunnel in my foot, but yeah, so anyway, folks, it's back to it's back to the basic show. After this, we're gonna need those questions and you can give them to us. You didn't ask for this gmailcom, that's all spelled out. But you can also find us on social media. You didn't ask pod. That's the letter. You didn't ask pod instagram, twitter, facebook, tiktok, etc. Etc. But I'd be remiss if I didn't plug one more time in the show notes. Go to our patreon. Yeah, we will be dropping the very first oops all tangents, oops, all tangents, oops, all tangents. Edition of you daft. We got merch coming. It is a promise. We will have this fucking thing launched by year's end at latest. It will happen and you'll get 20% off with the middle tier there. And, of course, hop into that Discord. Right the fuck now and get at us, get at us. Get at us is what I said, eric, did we miss anything?

Eric:

Not a goddamn thing, my friend.

Matt:

Then I think, from all of us here, you didn't ask for this for the 100th time. My name is Matt Shea, my name's Eric Poach and listen, you didn't ask.

Eric:

But today we did.

Matt:

Today we did Come here and hug me buddy. Come here and hug me buddy, come over here. I love you oh my God, I'm going to eat the shit out of that pizza. You're a good man, you know what. Let's end this fucking thing by seeing how this tastes.

Eric:

Yeah, I think it's going to be a good pie. Yeah oh man, oh oh yeah, get in it, bob you king.

Matt:

Wash the couch.

Eric:

I'll eat it.

Matt:

Here we go. Taste test. Good job, eric. Oh, that hits, you know what. The pineapple with the bacon and everything oh, I love it.

Eric:

This is rocking, yeah, and I normally don't go in for green peppers, but it worked very well with this. Yeah, yeah.

Matt:

Excellent ordering Good bet, good bet, good bet. Thank you.