Eric: 0:00

Just give me one minute. I am going to pop a Zyrtec. Oh, yeah, sure. Oh sorry, no, I lied, I'm not going to pop a Zyrtec, I'm going to pop that Kirkland Signature, allertech, absolutely.

Matt: 0:13

You know I do the same. I'm also a Zyrtec boy, by which I mean I go with that just because it's a little bit cheaper.

Juniper: 0:26

But you know, I have questions about it.

Matt: 0:27

I, uh, I can feel the sniffles coming so I'm just gonna, yeah, take one of those absolutely um kirkland brand. Honestly, that's. That's sort of the exception to my rule. You know what I mean. What, like, are you a store brand person? Or like, do you get name brand?

Eric: 0:42

oh, I go generic all the damn time. Oh, eric, I go, I go. If it ain't kirkland, I go generic.

Matt: 0:49

Oh, eric, I knew you were a fool. It's the same eric. It's the same active ingredient. There's active ingredients, the fda, the fda. You're gonna come in here with the fda, like you know their business, the father daddy administration. Yes, stop it, stop. Come in here with the FDA, like you know their business, the Father-Daddy Administration. Yes, stop it, stop it. Stop it right now with the Father-Daddy Administration. Wait a minute, all right. Hold on Zyrtec is one thing, because now that it's not prescription and by now I mean the last 15, 20 years that it's not prescription it's super expensive. So I get it and I do use it and it does work. But I went through another generic brand that did not work, that was didn't work. That was a knockoff zyrtec, because when you say store brand, that's what it is, it's a knockoff did it.

Eric: 1:37

Have what zyrtec has in it, like the let me ask you something like the the citizen the satirizine hcl 10 milligram. You're doing a great job. Which is purpose is an antihistamine. Does it have that? Because that's what kirkland signature has let me ask you something eric, yeah, tylenol, advil, etc.

Matt: 1:55

Etc. You get the store brand yeah, it's the same do you get store brand, like the one sticking point with me and lindsey particularly? Yeah, is is day quill and night quill. Do you get store rent?

Eric: 2:12

like the cvs version or whatever, it's the same gosh dang thing. Jump off a cliff and, yes, I would get a store brand parachute when'm sick, I'm not fucking around with store brand you know, fake NyQuil.

Matt: 2:30

I need the real shit that I know is going to work.

Eric: 2:34

I would trust Kirkland Signature to make my goddamn coffin Forget Kirkland.

Matt: 2:41

Kirkland is on a different level. Yeah, we've already explored this way back in the day 365 tablets of that shit for fucking $14.

Eric: 2:50

Are you kidding me In the?

Matt: 2:51

teens $24?. Calm down with the Kirkland. Okay, I want their money. Forget about Kirkland for a minute. Kirkland stands alone. Costco, no, no, I'm serious. Costco is the biggest retailer of wine in the united states, so, like costco, has a giant asterisk next to them, because they have quality stuff and quality products.

Eric: 3:22

And affordable prices and affordable prices, pry that $1.50 glizzy from my cold dead hands. The fuck are you talking about with the glizzy, the $1.50 glizzy at.

Matt: 3:31

Costco what is a glizzy? You've mentioned this on several episodes now and I'm breaking down what is a glizzy.

Eric: 3:39

You look me dead in the fucking eye right now and you tell me are you telling me? You do not know what a glizzy is?

Matt: 3:44

yes, I don't know what a glizzy can I'm just gonna.

Eric: 3:47

I've gone along with it on the last several remember any of the contexts in which I said the word glizzy or glizzy goblin or listen eric glizzy gluckin eric, or you haven't said those things.

Juniper: 4:02

You haven't said those things. I know you don't. I've been known to say them.

Matt: 4:05

I believe you and I also know you don't remember a goddamn word you say on this podcast, correct? So I, the arbiter of our history, will tell you. You haven't said those things before in a recorded medium, but I'm glad you said them now so someone can learn from you. But what? What I mean to say is that you have said the term glizzy, yeah, and I've just assumed and I say this with all the love and respect that I have for you, yeah, that that was just another one of the the some shit poach says.

Matt: 4:41

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, it's the spaghetti just coming out looking for a wall like what you know, your nicknames and whatnot but you are, you've continued to bring it up as if it's part of the pop culture lexicon, and is that something I need to know about?

Eric: 4:56

it is part of the, the cultural lexicon. Explain it to me. You walk up to a zoomer and you don't know what a glizzy is. They will fucking eat you alive. Okay, you hanging out with zoomers kit. They're gonna be running this shit one day. I have to get on the right side of history. This shit meaning this podcast? Yes, who? Who's replacing us? Now? I realize what you asked not the podcast, bro.

Matt: 5:22

Well, I mean.

Eric: 5:23

The children are the future. Matthew.

Matt: 5:25

That is how time works. Yes On, look on On, dad, I tell you this they're saying on dad Now they're passed on God.

Eric: 5:34

Matt man on God was like, so 2018. Eric.

Matt: 5:41

Are you being a try hard right now? I am.

Eric: 5:47

Does Matt, does this look like trying to do? Is what I really want to know, you know.

Matt: 5:53

I did have to tell you to button your shirt.

Eric: 5:57

So y'all it is. It is sweltering out this.

Matt: 6:01

Yeah, eric, eric, okay, welter, in out this. Yeah, eric, eric came for. Okay, for, for full disclosure, earlier today eric told me that, hey, can we push? I've got a barbecue. I was just invited to and I said, yeah, sure, go have fun. And he comes to me.

Eric: 6:17

He's got his shirt open and he basically says, yeah, let's get this over with so I can get back to my barbecue I I I'm sitting like a mafia don in one of his safe houses in rio, really, I mean, like all I'm missing is the gold chain open button down.

Matt: 6:40

Uh, hawaiian-esque shirt you've got going on here.

Eric: 6:44

Tell me, does he still draw breath? Oh man, yeah, so I did that. But glizzies, can I just please for me and for the listeners, and primarily for the listeners. I know you won't do it for me, but do it for them. Yeah, guess what do you think? A glizzy is A glizzy. I could have some glizzies, I could go for some glizzies. Is it soda? No, no, no, no, you're in kind of, you're almost in the sport.

Matt: 7:19

Is it a milkshake?

Eric: 7:22

No, no, no, no, you're still see right now you're playing.

Matt: 7:24

Is it a hot?

Eric: 7:24

dog, it is a hot dog. Matthew A glizzy is a hot dog. Fuck that. No, Matt, Matt, I reject that. Matt see the hand.

Juniper: 7:38

Let me ask you this.

Eric: 7:39

See the hand that I am thrusting out to you, almost imploring you to take it and join me on the right side of it.

Matt: 7:47

Matt, I would not lie to you on this All right, I believe you, and what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna take that hand and I'm gonna just gently push it back till it covers your mouth, because here's what I wanna know.

"Werner Herzog": 8:00

Matt, I wanna help you.

Matt: 8:01

Eric, do me a favor. Yeah, shut the fuck up, matt. I want to help you.

"Werner Herzog": 8:01

No no, no, eric, do me a favor. Yeah, shut the fuck up.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 8:01

Hey.

Matt: 8:06

What I want to ask you is has Joey Chestnut, the patron saint of the hot dog?

Eric: 8:14

Glizzy Gobbler in chief has he adopted Glizzy?

Matt: 8:19

Has he owned Glizzy? Because if Joey Chestnut is a glizzler, a gluzzler, a gluzzler, a gluzzler, then then I will accept it as truth. Until then, gen z, I'm so sorry, it don't impress on me much does joey chestnut call glizzies glizzies?

Eric: 8:39

this is my. Is that what you put in google? No, that's what Google autocorrected. That's what Google's like. Hey dog. Okay, I found his Instagram and would you accept it if he refers to it in a post as glizzy at any point?

Matt: 8:56

Yes.

Eric: 8:57

Okay, yes, I would.

Matt: 8:59

Okay, Ooh, would you accept a hashtag? Did he hashtag something? It's hashtag glizzy no but would you accept?

Eric: 9:06

I haven't seen that yet. I haven't seen that yet is what I'm saying, so I need to know.

Matt: 9:10

If Mr Chestnut put it down, then I'll accept it.

Eric: 9:14

So I can't find it. But what I will say is this If Joey Chestnut gets on the right side of history, good for him. But there is a right side of history, good for him. But there is a right side of history here. And matt eric, like the I saw when I was in chicago, matt, three years ago at this point I was walking behind middle schoolers when we were going back to our airbnb for riot fest. There was like schools letting out and there was like a mob of fucking middle schoolers in front of us and they all just started. Yo we getting glizzies, let's get like 11 year olds, 12 years yo we getting glizzies, glizzies I'm like't get name brand anything.

Eric: 10:05

Correct. What is a name? What is a fucking name, Matthew?

Matt: 10:10

It's everything, eric. Let's start the show. I'm embarrassed and ashamed. Glizzy, glizzy, glizzy, stop it. Iceland, great glizzies. No, they don't have glizzies. There's no way that Icelanders say glizzy. There's no way. Hello everybody, and welcome to you. Didn't Ask For this, the podcast answering life's least pressing questions. My name's Mache. My name's Eric Poach. Eric Poach, how are you, besides everything we just talked about, because I can't go back.

Eric: 10:48

Sweating, glizzies et cetera doing phenomenally. Just got back from a little family barbecue around the corner.

Matt: 10:55

Yeah, indeed.

Juniper: 10:55

Yeah yeah, yeah, and going right back to it apparently, yes, no, my cousin lives 100 feet from my house.

Matt: 11:00

I'm sorry to inconvenience you with this show. No, I'm sorry to inconvenience you with this show. No, no, no, no.

Eric: 11:04

You're not inconveniencing me, matt, you're inconveniencing my family.

Matt: 11:08

Oh, okay, well, that's fine then.

Juniper: 11:10

The family remembers.

Matt: 11:12

The family never forgets, the family remembers. Well, listen, I think we got a lot of show here. Oh yeah, we do. We got a special guest coming later on in the show because it's about time for a Lindsay's Correction. Corner Got to get it's due, it is. We are overdue.

Eric: 11:34

So Lindsay will be. A reckoning is at hand.

Matt: 11:35

A reckoning truly is at hand. Lindsay will be joining us later in the program, so you have to listen. Pretend you can't fast forward to get to Lindsay. Uh yes, so settle, settle, settle, settle for us settle down for us settle down for us. So there's that Um and uh we did just just today, uh, prior to recording, we received a voicemail on the thought line that mentioned that they wanted this tied to Lindsay's Correction Corner. So we will play that later on. Potential shots fired. Potential shots fired.

Eric: 12:14

Who could?

Matt: 12:14

say but we do have a little business to take care of right at the top here. Yeah, for one thing I just want to mention real quick. I just want to mention real quick we've added a new link to our show description on most platforms Spotify, apple Podcasts, et cetera. That says send us a text message at the beginning of the episode description and if you click that you can, it sends us a text, so you can just send us questions that way now.

Eric: 12:46

You don't even have to talk into an answering machine, but you should, but you should absolutely should leave us a voicemail. You can shoot us a text.

Matt: 12:52

Shoot us a text. All the other methods apply. I'll run through it. I'll through run through them at the end, of course. But also big news as of today, we just started a meager little tiktok account. So we have yes, we've put, we're going to start posting some video clips of us. This matthew.

Eric: 13:14

This is why we're in tiktok now this that we're in their world now, not ours, eric, don't pretend tag glizzy eric.

Matt: 13:22

you have openly told me you don't participate in t Hashtag glizzy gate Eric to pull something from our lexicon. I want I'm saying this to you as a friend- yeah, here it comes. You're a bit of a poser right now. Wow, sit in it Wow.

Eric: 13:39

Sit in it until you can accept it. This makes me want to do that recent TikTok trend where you let all the air out of your lungs and then you scream I'm going to go ahead and do it. That's how mad I am at you right now. You're embarrassing yourself On dad Shall we continue?

Matt: 13:56

Shall we continue. Indeed, speaking of the thought line, we have a very interesting voicemail from good friend of the pod, juniper, who's thrown in a couple of questions here. And Juniper answered the call from our episode with the Neatcast. You may remember my in fact, let's pull it in, let's pull the clip in. You may remember, mike from the Neatcast gave us a little bit of a quandary, a mathematical quandary.

Eric: 14:30

That we failed to answer over the course of like two hours.

Matt: 14:33

Well, we answered it, but we didn't answer it mathematically, so let's bring in the flashback.

Mike from the Neatcast: 14:40

Two trains are driving toward one another. The first train leaves town A at 5 am, traveling at 60 miles per hour. The second train leaves Town B at 7 am, traveling 70 miles per hour. The distance between Town A and Town B is 455 miles. What is the exact time the collision will occur?

Matt: 14:59

Okay, okay, all right Now there's a trap here.

Eric: 15:03

There is a trap, I can sense it. I can sense it, I can feel it.

Matt: 15:06

The trap would be figuring it out.

Eric: 15:08

The trap.

Matt: 15:09

So, yes, so we put it out there.

Eric: 15:11

If anyone wanted to actually solve it, please go ahead and do so To solve the goblin's riddle, to solve the troll's task, mike is a goblin. Mike will tell you he's a goblin, yeah. Love the guy While he's doing an Ollie and like being beloved by all of social media. Apparently, everybody loves Mike.

Matt: 15:32

Yeah, he's a. He's a great dude and is indeed he's a good boy and is indeed a mathematical goblin. So, juniper, what do you got for us?

Juniper: 15:42

Hi, this is Juniper. Juniper, what do you got for us? Hi, this is Juniper, and the answer to the train puzzle is 9.34 am with 37 seconds. Down to the second Also yes, I did do that math on my own, although the internet helped me remember how to do it.

Matt: 16:01

Juniper. Juniper, I applaud you. And now, obviously, since you answered that question, I did have to check it. I had to check the math and I I don't know if my general demeanor betrays this, but I obviously don't know how to do that math no, no, no, so I went to chat GBT Didn't feel like it and I went to chat GBT. I put in oh, you asked the robot. I knelt at the AI altar. I knelt at the AI altar, that's like that.

Matt: 16:39

And I typed out Mike's quandary and I watched it as it went through. It told me the different steps I needed to do to solve it, but it also did what I actually wanted, which was just solve it for me. And it said, eric, the exact time the trains will collide is approximately 934 am.

Eric: 17:03

With 37 seconds.

Matt: 17:05

She just dunked on google, so fucking hard it was open ai, but yes, they she did indeed, sure, uh, I think many a silicon valley executive would yell at you about that. But yeah, who gives a shit about them?

Eric: 17:22

juniper with Okay, matt, I've been thinking about this. Tell me, juniper Crushed it. Crushed it, absolutely annihilated it. Also, juniper has been so good to us yeah, just from day one, absolutely From day one, sending us a very nice email telling me, warning me, about the dangers of staring directly into the sun. Give it up for Juniper everybody and absolutely Sends us this she just sent us something recent too.

Matt: 17:53

Yeah, she sends us questions all the time.

Eric: 17:56

She sends baller-ass questions all the time. I think, matt, are we not lords? Well, in Sealand, we are In Sealand. Are we not lords? Well, in Sealand, we are In Sealand. Are we not lords? Absolutely, I've got a diploma on my wall.

Matt: 18:09

You don't because you're too lazy to buy a fucking frame, but yeah.

Eric: 18:13

Is it also not true that, as lords we like, we need a retinue of knights? We do, I think, juniper. I think several people could or should qualify.

Matt: 18:29

Juniper's gunning for our retinue.

Eric: 18:31

Yeah, I think Juniper's in. I think like get knighted, get, like arise, arise.

Matt: 18:39

Sir Juniper.

Eric: 18:41

Sir Juniper of the sun, Like of the patron knight of mathematics.

Matt: 18:48

You and I represent the sun now.

Eric: 18:51

No, she is just of the sun. Oh, she's powerful.

Matt: 18:54

She's powerful, yeah, she speaks to, she shines so brightly. Because she shines so bright, I love that. And I love that for Juniper, and I love that you actually solved the question that Mike put forward, that he 100% never actually solved. So thank you, juniper, for setting us on the right track.

Eric: 19:12

Juniper, if an enemy army was at our gates and the dread generals were calling forth for us to send a champion, you're number one pick, number one pick, juniper. We're saying you'll put them in the dirt. Juniper, you'll answer the people's cries.

Matt: 19:29

And with that Eric, should we not get into the meat of the program and answer some questions? Yes, yes. Now we have pushed a question from your beloved for like two episodes now. So you want to let's start off on the right foot and make sure we get to it. So, eric, give it to us.

Eric: 19:48

So Alyssa's question, which I begged her to send in once she came up with it, was Matt. We inarguably live in a golden age of video game adaptations.

Matt: 20:02

I really do feel that way. I have talked about this on the social medias, on my own private network, several times. I think with, with, on the heels of the last of us, and specifically the last of us, and fallout. Yes, I think we have entered the golden age of video game adaptations, in the sense that they're not, and there there are outliers mortal kombat, for example uh well, mortal kombat annihilate the most recent mortal no, the original, the original, the original mortal kombat slaps.

Eric: 20:37

Mortal kombat, annihilation, his also slaps, but for very different reasons I'm saying this, I'm what I'm saying is the?

Matt: 20:45

the film mortal combat, yeah, was one of the rare examples of like of a great adaptation that, god?

Eric: 20:55

I thought we were about to throw hands.

Matt: 20:56

That works no, that works in both mediums, but for such, for such a long time, you had the mario brothers movie, the first one with bob hoskins, which also slaps it's a bad movie, but it's a great bad it is blade runner, but mario, it rules it does not, but it does do you know what my favorite thing is about mud?

Eric: 21:19

it's dirty and it's clean at the same time. Dennis hopper, super mario brothers starring bob hoskins and john like, johnny likes eric, I'm so proud of how many actors you know in that film.

Matt: 21:30

That's a deep cut. But what I'm what I'm trying to say is that fallout and the last of us like oh, fallout, a little too early to predict its emmy nominations, but but it is deserving of them.

Eric: 21:45

It's a question of which, not if.

Matt: 21:47

I agree completely and wholeheartedly. Yes, but what I'm saying is like we have reached the moment when a video game adaptation can succeed in both mediums. The Last of Us show, while different from the game, impeccable, the game impeccable. Game impeccable, fallout. The series, obviously great, is beloved, the show is great and you need no knowledge of the games to enjoy the show it's so well done so.

Eric: 22:21

with that in mind, acknowledging that we are in this golden age of video game adaptations, the question is you are tasked with making the next like hit fucking adaptation series for a video game. We got to make the next fucking fallout, the next, the Last of Us. What game do we pick? And we can only pick games from 1980s, arcade cabinets and this is very important. We can only afford the rights to video games from arcades in the 1980s.

Matt: 22:58

Now I haven't seen the new Mario Brothers movie. That is technically an arcade cabinet.

Eric: 23:04

Yes, it is so weirdly enough. There is so weirdly enough, there is a. There's mario brothers, which is the original mario jumping over the barrels trying to get dk, but there then there was the home console game, super mario brothers. But that game also had a cabinet it's donkey kong what you?

Matt: 23:20

what you just eric, eric, eric, sorry, what you just described. Oh, eric, eric, eric, sorry what you just described, oh, no, no yeah, I did describe Donkey Kong, sorry the original Mario Brothers.

Eric: 23:28

You're in a sewer and you're bumping fucking turtles off of the thing. There is a Mario Brothers arcade cabinet, there is a Donkey Kong cabinet and they did in fact make a Super Mario Brothers cabinet.

Matt: 23:38

What we're talking about with these 80s arcade cabinets. These 80s arcade cabinets, some of the big hitters right are galaga, are pac-man, are centipede, are galaga, space invaders, street fighter, uh, which there is and frogger yes, uh, tapper frogger, I think frogger, it has the makings of a great Pixar movie.

Eric: 24:06

It would have to be a Pixar. It'd have to be. It'd have to be Pixar.

Matt: 24:10

DreamWorks or Pixar one of them, guys but it has to be an animated feature with I don't. I'm serious In the moment. This just landed in my head. Okay, tom Holland as Frogger. Tom Holland as Frogger, tom Holland as frogger frogger matt walk me through your process. I can see the scene of frogger in the pixar style played by tom holland played by tom holland.

Matt: 24:38

Well, what I'm saying is I can see the the visage of a frogger Dodging in the Pixar style Truck. Prius motorcycle has a little aside with a food truck that passes by him. He grabs a glizzy, potentially.

Eric: 25:00

Yes, he could, Matthew, Very good.

Matt: 25:03

Matthew, but he's panicked and he's, you know, he's having existential crisis and all of that, I don't know. It led me to Tom Holland.

Eric: 25:13

Okay, okay, now is the entire movie. I think the entire movie would have to be about him getting across the road, like it's not like there's multiple roads throughout the thing. It it's like one level of frogger is the entire movie. I think it's a slice of life in like frogger's day oh, I don't know that, I agree, it's another day on the job for frogger and like I think there could be an entire art like just it. It would be a movie about that kind of thing where, like hey, when you come down to this size, like to us, it's just a frog hopping across. Kind of thing. Where, like hey, when you come down to this size, like to us, it's just a frog hopping across a couple of highways. But to the frog, that was like an Epic adventure. Do you know what I mean? Am I selling you on this now?

Matt: 25:55

No, I do know what you mean, but I don't think you get if I were to play the role of a Pixar executive. I don't think that's a feature film. I think what we need is like the same thing of a Frogger game it has to escalate. We have to start with like a dirt road we have to move on to, and then you end up at the end of him delivering a package or something across like a super spider web, super highway.

Eric: 26:25

Okay, yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah he's jumping from overpass to overpass of six lane highways, yeah is, is he like a sort of now what is the driving? Why does he need to get across this highway?

Matt: 26:38

oh, I'm gonna say his son was abducted his son was a little too.

Eric: 26:44

Finding nemo hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Finding frogger uh. Finding frogger jr. Uh, could he be like a sort because it sounds like there's increasing danger. So he's definitely, it's high stakes, it's whatever it is I think, could it be like? Is it it a rite of passage for his frog people? Is this like? Do we give it like any sort of mystical?

Matt: 27:11

vibe I don't know about mystical, but maybe there's something about that he has to go get, like there's something he has to go bring back to his community, like there needs to like a Bugs Life-esque tie-in. You know, not tie-in, but like that sort of vibe, because I I agree it should be slice of life, but it needs to be elevated right, like the early what we, what we are introduced to him, just crossing the street to get to the pond or whatever. That's the slice of life. But then there has to be some sort of reason for him to go on a grand adventure.

Eric: 27:47

Oh, yeah, so. So I think at the start he's like a bit, uh, he's like a big frog in a little pond kind of thing, where it's like he's the hottest shit of his, of his community, like the road by where he grew up knows that like he's, he's hot shit, he's hop, he's, hop shit. Nice, they should use that in the promotional material absolutely. But then, yeah, there's a call to action. He's got to up his game. He's got to go to the bigger roads, the more dangerous roads, and and he learns that, oh, oh man, I was, I was just hopping, hopping two lanes in Tucson, and now he's got a. He's got to step it up to the big dogs or the big frogs. He's, you're hopping with the big frogs now, ok, tell me that's not genius.

Matt: 28:36

Hopping with the big frogs. Now that's the tagline of the film. One hundred percent.

Eric: 28:40

It's one of a few. You know Pixar, they'll have a couple.

"Werner Herzog": 28:43

They'll go Well, you, one of a few. You know, pixar, they'll have a couple.

Eric: 28:45

They'll oh well you gotta have a couple, because different markets each of the different beloved characters. Which brings me to my next question what, uh? Who is john ratzenberger voicing? That's good question um who is the delivery truck guy, the early the food truck guy does he? Does he work the food truck? Does he always see? How is that like? The running bit is like every road. He, the food truck guy, ends up on every road all roads lead to the food truck guy.

Matt: 29:11

Yeah, well, he's everywhere is. The twist is is yeah, it's a kid's movie. It shouldn't be a uh.

Eric: 29:19

It shouldn't be a food truck, it should be an ice cream truck it should be an ice cream truck and I think the ice cream truck, uh, driver, voiced by john ratzenberger. The twist should be he's the bat, like he's the big bad. Yeah, he's been chasing, it's like something. It's like oh my, my ice cream.

Matt: 29:40

That is nothing no that was nothing not even approaching but john ratzenberger, let alone a John Ratzenberger impression.

Eric: 29:49

He had a bad run in with a frog when he was little. He got scared. Now he hates frogs.

Matt: 29:53

He wants to make a frog flavored ice cream.

Eric: 29:56

He wants to make a frog flavored ice cream.

"Werner Herzog": 29:58

Yes, he's French.

Eric: 30:01

He's French. Now, it's just this fucking little mermaid.

Matt: 30:08

Can you imagine? Can you imagine? Can you imagine? Just imagine listeners, we're not going to try to do it, I don't think. Imagine john ratzenberger doing a french accent I've seen ratatouille but when we think about like the, the, the heavy hitters of, like these arcade games, I think the big two, besides donkey kong, which I think is too entrenched in the mario brothers universe to be done- mario feels like a cop out it does feel like a cop out.

Matt: 30:36

So I think galaga and pac-man, I think are really the two and pac-man, especially because they often came on the same machine.

Eric: 30:45

That's what I'm saying.

Matt: 30:46

They're big pillars of arcade Cabinet glory days.

Eric: 30:51

Yeah, they are what you think of when you think arcade. Like I grew up with a Galaga Pac-Man machine in the laundromat we would go do laundry at when I was growing up.

Matt: 31:01

And I don't. I don't think that you can get a good film Out of Pac-Man.

Eric: 31:05

I don't think that you can get a good film out of pac-man. I don't think. Uh, you could like do you want to work? You can't get a good film out of pac-man without just inventing so much shit like exactly it.

Matt: 31:17

It's too much. Because you do that, you're going to end up with a pixels, the adam sandler vehicle yes, oh, matt, sorry, uh, this just in this, just dropped on my feed.

Eric: 31:28

Uh, for the frogger film yes, already have the sequel. Okay, ready for it. Get to the end. They. Frogger conquers the. The final road defeats john ratzenberger.

Matt: 31:42

Uh, the day is saved, sends the ice cream truck off the overpass in into fiery death in classic pixar fashion.

Eric: 31:52

Uh, but they have the. Oh, we won. And then there's the post credits. Yes, post credits. Oh, you thought that was a road. This is a road. Sequel Frogger goes to NASCAR. It's a Cars tie-in.

Matt: 32:11

Cars tie-in. It's a Cars tie-in, cars tie-in. That's how you reinvigorate the Cars universe.

Eric: 32:18

You just because it's been on life support.

Matt: 32:22

And you know what, to creep into the 90s. We can, we, maybe we can even do a try crossover with cruising usa oh my dude, a cruising usa movie, cruising world, cruising world you got the speed cruising, cruising the usa you got the power to cruise the world. I fucking loved Cruising USA.

Eric: 32:50

Cruising USA, cruising World, both Cruising the world, you and me.

Matt: 32:57

I loved Cruising USA and Cruising World. In an arcade you sit down. You feel like a god, as you're nine years old, cruising around in a heavily pixelated corvette you want to be a corvette, you want to be an ice cream truck.

Eric: 33:12

You want to be. You want to be a pickup truck. You want to be whatever you want you want to be riding a fucking man by the as later, and so they're still making games and they are. It is just unhinged they're still making cruising usa, not cruising usa. I think they're still making uh like into the 2010s.

Matt: 33:29

They were make, they were still making cruising series oh yeah, but I mean, like to this day they're not cruising, is not still going?

Eric: 33:37

uh, it might, it might, bitch, it might I'm on it.

Matt: 33:41

I'm on it.

Juniper: 33:42

Okay okay, okay, okay.

Matt: 33:44

So here we go, I got it. The Cruisin' universe includes the following Cruisin' USA the Cruisiverse. Cruisin' USA came out in 1994. Yeah, let that sink in. Cruisin' World came out in 1996. Yep, and then we got in 1999, exotica, which I remember that. I do remember cruising exotica. Everything else I'm about to say I do not recall. Uh, in two in 2001, for the game boy advance. Oh, holy shit, we got cruising velocity, uh, which is the fourth entry into the series.

Matt: 34:25

Okay, the fifth entry to the series didn't come until 2007. Oh, we're getting so close to me being right, and it was simply called Cruisin' and was released on the Wii. Okay, it was originally released as the Fast and the Furious, based on the Fast and the Furious franchise and developed and published by raw thrills, but it was ported by just games interactive and published as cruising, and then the latest edition in the series give it to me came out in 2017 yes and it's called cruising blast oh, I played cruising blast.

Eric: 35:04

I played that at mag fest. It's fucking fun as shit.

Matt: 35:08

It's both an arcade game and is available for nintendo switch. They take your picture but you, you started.

Eric: 35:14

It takes a picture of your face and like, have that over your car for real. I might look this up on switch later please, please, do it's, it's dope, or if you come to MAGFest you could play it.

Juniper: 35:25

Oh.

Matt: 35:27

A little. What's it called A little cross promotion? A little cross promotion for MAGFest oh, the Music and Gaming Festival MAGFest Music and Gaming Festival.

Eric: 35:35

It happens around January each year in National Harbor we also have events MAG West and MAG Stock so we have events throughout the year that you can check out if you like music and gaming. There you go, babes. Yeah, mag fest.

Matt: 35:55

Well, to be clear, I don't get paid a fucking dime to do that volunteer baby. Yeah, but you were on the board until I am on the board.

Eric: 35:58

I thought you were done. Voted in for a second term baby wow so cross, so so cross promotional. You might not get paid, but you are on the board yeah, volunteer position, baby, please bear that in mind for your local events. Many of them all run by volunteers. Very few paid positions, so be kind to them. How?

Matt: 36:17

about that, yeah. So with all that in mind, yes, you can play that at magfest and you can also play it on the switch. So that's cruising. I do think there is a world where you get the cruising frogger uh, cars tie-in 100, oh my god.

Eric: 36:34

And now the next cruising installation. You can play as lightning mcqueen if you want.

Matt: 36:38

Oh my god, yeah but you get, that's the uh, that's the loot crate that you have to buy.

Eric: 36:42

Yes, yes that is you got to have like. I don't know if you've seen the arcade cabinet meta in recent years. A lot of them now come with like rfid cards and shit like that. You can carry your saves around in your wallet and like and like people no, I didn't know any track their global rankings and stuff. It's no longer just by machine. You're on a network and you're, you're playing against those and you can play against people on like in other arcades because, god forbid, we have a non-wifi linked up arcade cabinet and that's why I'm glad we're sticking to our moral high ground and going.

Eric: 37:19

80s arcade cabinets only my friend I agree once. Once frogger is a sleeper runaway hit, then we can think about with cruising money. But right now we got frogger money but I think that galaga has the possibility.

Matt: 37:36

Galaga's got legs. We can make a battle star galactica remake.

Eric: 37:42

Oh oh yes, oh yeah, barely file the serial numbers off of it.

Matt: 37:47

Adaptation of Galaga, where it's serious, where it's gritty, where, like gritty ass Gal, that's what we want. Now, this doesn't count because it came out in the nineties and I'm not even a hundred percent sure it was ever in arcades. But I'll tell you what movie I would 100% cancel plans to go see.

Eric: 38:06

Okay, Battletoads, battletoads, 100%. Still the hardest pause music I've ever. It goes so Sorry.

Matt: 38:17

I loved Battletoads.

Eric: 38:21

Battletoads was also fucking horrendously difficult. Yeah, it was really hard it was most people didn't know it had a third level it was up there with uh.

Matt: 38:31

I think it was conga uh contra there. Contra you're right. Contra is what? Also you want to talk about pause music pour one out for GoldenEye, oh.

Eric: 38:54

Like that fucking. They invented lo-fi.

Matt: 38:58

Honestly, it's a jam. It's still a vibe to this day.

Eric: 39:02

I was reading about GoldenEye speed running controversies the other day I was watching an educational film about it.

Matt: 39:07

Of course you were it was remember last night when you asked me.

Eric: 39:11

Yep, that was like remember. Last night, matt and I were at a party, and of course we're at a party with all these people that we hardly ever see and we're just talking to each other gravitate and just sit to each other like talk. Yeah, uh, matt questioning uh will you pay you?

Matt: 39:25

you told me you pay for youtube, red youtube premium.

Eric: 39:29

Isn't that youtube red isn't the same thing? I don't think. I don't think they call it red okay, you pay for youtube I pay for ad for youtube and I'm never fucking going back. Jesus christ, it is. They've made it and that isn't a compliment to youtube. Fuck youtube for making me do it. But uh, yeah, the ads are parasitic at this point, so I I I fork it over and I watch so much youtube. Wow, and I and I was learning about golden eye speed running controversies on youtube. How about that?

Matt: 39:58

yeah, so I think those are some good examples of some some uh good films that we can adapt.

Eric: 40:05

Yeah, from the arcade lexicon, um, but I do think we need to get into another question here before we uh get to our closing segment um, all, but also I will, as long as we're filing serial numbers off of movies and just generally improving them and their and their you know palatability. For for the modern person, silent scope, silent scope Would make a sick. But that was not eighties, that was very firmly late nineties, early 2000,. Mid nineties maybe? Yeah, but that would, that would be a very good. That'd be like the phone booth ripoff or American sniper Phone booth Great movie Phone booth Great.

Matt: 40:45

Give it up for phone booth great give it up for phone booth. Great movie grid. Villainous voice role for keifer sutherland. Oh, keifer, uh, excellent film. Yeah, go see phone booth now, eric, I have this question for you. Go check out phone booth on a dvd on on on some channel called Jubilee.

Eric: 41:09

So it's a. It's an Amazon app.

Matt: 41:12

Eric, what is the proper etiquette of the driving wave?

Eric: 41:15

Oh man, I have. I've got a dog in this race, matt. Okay, and you know I have a dog in this race. You're a Jeeper, I'm Jeepers, mr. You're a jeeper, I'm jeepers. Mister, you're a jeeper creeper.

Matt: 41:29

I'm a. Now I know that jeep people, because they're insane, have their own. They're a cult, they have their own communication system. Yeah, do you want to walk us through that first before we get into? It's very simple.

Eric: 41:44

Okay, jeep is a cult. Yeah, I. Now I don't think I'm better than anyone, but jeep is objectively a cult and I, I pay my daily observance. I, I, I'm a level one. I'm a level one jeep cult, which means I do the jeep wave and the jeep wave. If you've ever ridden in a jeep or been in a jeep and another jeep passes you, you are morally obligated to wave at them. But the waving matthew, uh, victorian fan etiquette ain't got shit on the jeep. Okay, the number of things that can be communicated by the tone of your wave. Do you still keep your hand gripping the steering wheel and just give them the four-finger salute? Do you? Does hand leave steering wheel, come up to the height of the forehead. That is recognizing an equal when. When the hand, when the hand doesn't leave the steering wheel, that is I am. I put a dollar in the donation basket today. Okay, when the hand leaves the, that is the common girl like.

Eric: 43:00

Matt, if your hand should exit the window, okay, it could be presumptuous to do that If you're doing if you're hand outing, that means we've either we've met or we've got the top down the layers of weight.

Eric: 43:17

And, matt, if you do not wave because there is, I'm just going to dispel this myth right now. In any interaction between two jeeps, there is no singular moment in which those two jeeps are not aware of each other. They said they know they're there, even if the person's wearing sunglasses and is staring in the opposite direction as they pass you. They know you're there and they're choosing not to wave. And why do you think?

Matt: 43:45

that is Because, eric, let me ask you something. You say you're a level one Jeep owner. Yeah, did you seek out a Jeep or did you end up with a Jeep?

Eric: 43:55

I sought out a Jeep just because I was 23 and I thought they looked cool.

Matt: 43:59

Interesting that you thought they look cool. I still think they look cool. I like my jeep and you know what I love that for you don't like how often I have to fix it, but I like it, do you think?

Eric: 44:10

and I, I'm just asking questions, I'm just asking questions, asking questions do you think jeep are good cars no, god, no, okay, all right, I just want to make sure a 23 year old will buy.

Matt: 44:21

I just wanted to make sure that you knew what the rest of society thought.

Eric: 44:25

Yeah, they're not good cars. They're not. Here's the wonderful thing about Jeeps Tell me they're so easy to fix and you will be fixing them a lot Often, yeah, often, they are money pit, they're just and it's a slow drip. Nothing ever too horrifying.

Matt: 44:45

You'd be like oh my god it'll, but you will just constantly and, to be fair, basic owning a car in general is a money pit, yeah and but things on the jeep will go wrong that you just didn't even know was on the table, like my right side mirror recently.

Eric: 45:03

Just quit, how does that happen, uh?

Matt: 45:06

did someone knock it out like you can.

Eric: 45:08

You know you reach out and like everything's like kind of manual in my jeep. I opted for this. I didn't get like power windows or anything.

Matt: 45:15

I have like actual rolly windows on my jeep yes, I was in your jeep recently and you were discovered you had rolled down windows long after that that that, yeah, had gone away oh yeah, but I also have.

Eric: 45:29

That means my mirrors aren't powered either, because, like there's no electronic, because the doors can come off if you get them with all that stuff. There's like a bunch of shit you have to now unhook if you, if you take the doors off, my side mirrors are have to be manually adjusted. They just you push on them and they tilt. Okay, so I noticed my side mirror was aimed at the fucking ground and not behind me, not helpful and I was like I was like oh, let me, let me fix that.

Eric: 45:56

I go to push it back up. It's just flopping now. It just quit, eric, it just quit I'm concerned for your safety. Here's the fucked up thing. I know know how to replace it. It's super easy, because I've had to replace the other one when that one broke. It's like a $40 part. I'll just slap that right on and that's how they bleed you Nice and slow, slowly, gently. This is how a life is taken.

Matt: 46:19

Okay. So darkest dungeon our life is taken. Okay, so darkest dungeon, but that's just Jeeps. Okay, jeep, have the have its own. Uh, there's, it is a system. It's a system, it is an etiquette, but when I'm talking about the driving wave, I'm talking more universal.

Eric: 46:33

Yeah, oh yeah.

Matt: 46:35

So what I'm suggesting to you is like someone lets you in to a, a busy lane or that's a wave. Yeah, that's a wave, but like, for example, I was driving the other day and there's car after car in front of me, is not? There's a stoplight coming up, it's going from yellow to red, and there's a like a shopping center off to my right that empties out onto the road. Somebody's trying to turn right, nobody's letting them in. I stop traffic because there's a red light coming up. There's no reason for me to try to keep going. So I stopped and I gave them I even gave them a little headlight flash to say come on through, courteous Guy comes out, does not give me a wave.

Matt: 47:32

And I have to say nothing spikes my road rage more than someone who does not wave in a situation where I feel a wave is required.

Eric: 47:44

Yeah, yeah, no, it is. There are many like okay, I would say my, my line, my, my thing. Tell me, I'm actually I, I, I, I completely understand and you are valid for feeling that burning, seething, rage when they when in that situation. Thank you, that's not the one that gets me. The one that gets me is when I'm in a suburb or like driving down a street and like it's that situation where there's only room enough for one car to go either way.

Eric: 48:10

And if I pull off to the side so that they can come through. That is a wave, my dear. That's a wave, that's a wave.

Matt: 48:17

And I think, to draw the line for etiquette, because that's what we're looking for. I think when draw the line for etiquette because that's what we're looking for, I think, basic decency, when it's yeah, when it's basic decency, or when it's not actually required, like I don't think a wave is required on your run-of-the-mill merge lane no because someone has to have gone out of their way for me. Somebody has to gone out of their way or has like elected to be kind. Yes, in which case it's a quick thank you. It's a quick I.

Eric: 48:52

I recognize that you did a nice thing and I want to be clear in this cruel world and I think we, you and I, will be aligned in this. I hope so. When we say doing a a kindness, something like if the other person has the right of way but they decide to wave me along, that is not a kindness, that is dangerous.

Juniper: 49:15

I agree with you.

Eric: 49:16

I judge the shit out of people who do that no, no, no You're putting me in danger.

Matt: 49:20

I cannot agree with you more. When someone is breaking driving laws or codes in order to do something, I find that this happens the most at a four-way stop sign, with someone who does not know how a four-way stop sign works. It's very simple, it's the easiest thing in the world you go around in the circle based on the order you arrived. It's very simple. There you go. But what happens? What I think psychologically, when there's someone who feels unsafe at a four-way stop, they want to get rid of everybody else. Yes, so they have zero danger. Be gone. Yes, they have zero danger of being T-boned or in any kind of accident, so they'll just wave people.

Eric: 50:11

They're just waving people. You got to trust. Everyone knows how these fucking rules work.

Matt: 50:14

You got to trust. But if you find me and you're like, no, no, no, you go ahead, you're going to find me yelling through my windshield, like, no, it's your turn, you go, then he goes, then she goes, then I go. This is not very hard, yeah, and so I agree, we are aligned.

Eric: 50:34

We are aligned. There's many things that like with us. I'm like, no doubt in my mind. We both stand.

Matt: 50:39

Yeah, we're aligned on obey the law.

Eric: 50:46

Yeah, yeah, we're both aligned with hey, don't get anyone killed just do that.

Matt: 50:49

what I'm saying is like here's another great example where the driving wave, I feel, comes into play okay, and often, most importantly, doesn't come into play Busy, poorly laid out parking lot Okay.

Juniper: 51:06

Oh.

Matt: 51:06

For example, there's one that I use by my old apartment that I used to frequent quite a bit. It's a busy shopping center and there's like a Starbucks, like right in the fucking middle of it.

Matt: 51:18

So there's like there's no good turn lanes into it. People are trying to go to Starbucks, other people are trying to go to the dollar store, across the way, like there's a and then there's a supermarket, so there's all kinds of foot traffic intermixed with too small of aisles to drive down, right, yep. And so what ends up happening is people are trying to turn off the main entrance street of the parking lot the strode, sure, the strode and can't get into these alleys because people are just acting like it's Mad Max out here, yeah, and trying to do whatever they want here and trying to do whatever they want. And so when I come to this and I can recognize this person's been waiting for like three, four cars and nobody's let them out, I'll go, come on out and I'll give them a little wave Come on through, friend, come on through, drive that wagon through this pass, and they give me nothing.

Eric: 52:29

They give me nothing. Oh, they give me nothing. Eric, you hitched your ox into theirs. That's a that is, but when time came to replace the wheel, none would be found that is enough, that's.

Matt: 52:38

That's enough of a slight that I'm willing to yell at you as you drive by, like I'll follow you from windshield to side door window to be like I won't say anything I'll just give you the you'll, you'll maintain eye contact.

Eric: 52:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah, the, the sheer, the, the disappointment, disapproval and disavowalment of any of any kinship you may have had.

Matt: 53:10

Yeah, I just think it's if you're I think that's the line right. If there's a, if there's an exception that has been made for you that didn't have to be made, yeah, you owe that person a wave. Yeah, somebody trying to get over on a busy highway and you actively slow down and flash your lights to be like, come in and they don't give you a wave, that person deserves to die. Did you know that?

Eric: 53:38

did you know? Have you heard the good news? Have you heard? Yeah, no, but especially because now more and more people are like COVID made us really fucking terrible drivers.

Matt: 53:53

I agree wholeheartedly.

Eric: 53:54

I don't know what happened? Oh, it was COVID.

Eric: 53:57

But like we forgot how to be in social situations with each other and we forgot how to fucking drive Because, like, I'll go to get over and people in baltimore do that thing so much where they see they could be three or four car lengths behind you easy, all they have to do is maintain their current speed. Everything's fine, because that's the only time I fucking change lanes and if I put my blinker on they will fucking foot pedal it speed speed up to get past me and I just have to. I was like you could not, I Okay.

Matt: 54:27

Nothing drives me more insane than somebody. We're approaching a stoplight and somebody is behind me and is tailgating me and then, like go a lane over to pass me, only to be right in front of me and stopped at the stoplight. Yeah, and without fail, I'm always like was it worth it? Was it worth all that shit to be fucking 30 feet closer to your destination?

Eric: 54:55

you know what matt it's karaoke tonight. Can I be tom petty for a second? Yeah?

Matt: 55:00

um, just don't break my heart.

Eric: 55:01

The your achy, breaky heart, you lost it you lost, I lost it. Did I want? Did I lose it? That's not tom petty are you being genuine?

Matt: 55:11

yeah, jump off a bridge okay, we talked about this.

Eric: 55:14

I'm bad with names you hold on, eric.

Matt: 55:17

No, I'm getting a little, I'm getting a little, I'm getting the fire's been lit a little bit.

Juniper: 55:22

Yeah.

Matt: 55:22

You don't know the difference between Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers and Billy Ray fucking Cyrus.

Eric: 55:30

Oh, is he the one that? Yeah, yeah, well, no, I know, you know.

Matt: 55:35

Who spawned Miley?

Eric: 55:37

Yeah.

"Werner Herzog": 55:38

I know.

Eric: 55:39

Oh, you do. I know the names.

Matt: 55:40

I just asked me to assign them to a human being, the idea that Tom Petty, one of the greatest songwriters of classic rock era, wrote A he Breaky Heart is offensive. Well, Matt, the writer of American Girl Wildflowers wildflowers.

Eric: 56:04

See, the best part is Alyssa's listening to this episode assuredly and just shaking her head and making the most like she's offering me. She at least gives me pity right now. Her face is one of pity right now. She shakes her head, matt, it's just cold.

Matt: 56:21

No, because somebody has to show you what society looks at you speaking of brings me right back to my favorite thing.

Eric: 56:28

When I need to show someone what society looks like. When I'm in the left-hand lane, when I'm the leftmost lane and I am already, when I'm following the pace of traffic yeah, say it diplomatically. When I am well and deserved to be in this left lane, yes. And someone like is riding my ass, yes, as if I'm not going fast enough, when I promise you I am, and they do that. They like swerve over. If there is another car in the lane they just passed into, I will immediately speed up, I will blockade this person.

Juniper: 57:03

Yes, I will trap them in the hell of their own making trap because, hey, I'm just following the pace of traffic.

Matt: 57:09

Let me tell you something else. Anyone, anyone try and listeners, listen to the sound of my voice. If anyone ever tries to pass you in a shoulder, you straddle that line, you keep that fucker in the shoulder.

Eric: 57:21

You hold the fucking line, hold the line especially this, matt. You're speaking near and dear to my heart right now because ever since the key bridge went down, poor one out. Uh, my commute is at the mercy of 895, 95 and 295, the fucking tunnels and the number of people. When I have sat in the line of cars to get on the 95, that is four fucking miles long and someone just rides it. Look at, or they ride the fucking shoulder trying to get it you're not clever, you're not smart, you're you're everything that is wrong with america and I'll expand, I'll even go further with that.

Matt: 58:00

If you're in a merge lane and you're not merging, you're waiting to the last fucking second of those dotted lines to merge. You are an asshole, you can go fuck. You can go fuck.

Eric: 58:12

Okay.

Matt: 58:13

I think All right, Now that my I think we've talked about that enough. Now that we're all nice and hot under the collar, yeah yeah. It's time to call my wife into the podcast yeah yeah, get her in here.

Eric: 58:26

Lindsay Dr. Lindsay Barr.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 58:33

It's me.

Eric: 58:34

Okay, phd. The D stands for darling of this podcast. Of the doctor or the phd uh the phd ph darling, now the the, the, the, the perfectly helpful darling of this podcast, phd jesus christ, that's very kind.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 58:59

I can assure you that I am not always perfectly helpful um, I also can assure you of that Now the. You can't assure anyone of anything.

Eric: 59:07

I've seen Doom 2. So the more you deny this, the more I will burn a crusade across a thousand worlds. In your name it was written.

Matt: 59:17

So now before? Obviously Lindsay. This is Lindsay's Correction Corner. Yes, but before we get into your corrections, earlier today we received a voicemail that invoked your Correction Corner. Yes so we're going to play that for everybody right now, and Eric is obviously oblivious to this. Yeah, I have oblivious to this. I have not listened to it. It's shocking to no one. So here we go.

"Werner Herzog": 59:50

This message is for Eric Poach. This message comes at a moment of dire need for you and the urgency is palpable, for me at least, and soon for you. You too, hopefully, you must dissect yourself from the shotgun full of salt with which you mentioned that you are using to terminate flies in your home. This is a great shame for many reasons Indeed and anguish with which you have been experiencing. I know not of the personal details of your life, but I can say with some certainty that this shotgun is the cause. I would also like to note I was offended recently, listening to your show, at the horrible impressions that you and Matthew you have referred to warring with in your home is called a Canada goose and let that be reflected, please, on the list of corrections.

"Werner Herzog": 1:01:39

With which your wife has supplied to you Long-time caller. Sorry, long-time listener. With which your wife has supplied to you long time caller. Sorry, long time listener. First time caller. My name is verner. Thank you for taking my message okay madden.

Eric: 1:01:58

an angel visited us this night. You're very welcome, Werner. Thank you, Dr Herzog. I assume he's a doctor.

Matt: 1:02:07

Thank you, Werner, for that wonderful correction.

Eric: 1:02:13

I mean, what do you say to that? What do you say I?

Matt: 1:02:16

say, to judge our impressions of Werner Herzog with, that impression is bold.

Eric: 1:02:25

I will say. The cadence, though, was flawless Cadence nailed.

Matt: 1:02:30

And yes, cadence was flawless. I accept that it's because that was. Werner Herzog, I accept that it is a Canada goose and not a Canadian goose. That's a valid correction, I guess.

Eric: 1:02:40

I appreciate, because if you want to be a pencil pusher, I do appreciate, because it did legitimately not occur to me that, uh, with a gun designed to spill salt, that I am cursing myself to bad luck. Absolutely, uh, that would explain my recent dire circumstances. Oh, no need to bring that up. I mean, it was mean it was after I visited Iceland and saw untellable natural beauty, went on this amazing trip with my partner, experienced the natural wonders of our world in a life-changing trip.

Matt: 1:03:16

Eric, you approached on the topic at any point.

Eric: 1:03:19

Yeah, I went to go walk the dog today and I couldn't find a poopy bag, so Anyway.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:03:24

Lindsay, you're here to give us correct yeah, you did invite me into this podcast and then start monologuing about something different, and I would like to get to the to my part yes, I also would like to.

Eric: 1:03:37

I am, as is eric, unclear as to what he was getting at, so oh, no, well, it's like it was just explaining, like now, all my rotten, terrible, awful misfortune, like not being able to find a poopy bag.

Matt: 1:03:49

That is now explained by the salt spilling gun lindsey is is spilling salt, bad luck yes, yes it is no that you can throw it over your shoulder if I'm aiming it oh that's why you throw it over your shoulder easy feel connected I'm sorry.

Eric: 1:04:04

All I'm hearing is now I blast, cock it over the shoulder blast.

Matt: 1:04:09

No, eric, you got to retrieve the spilled salt instant cleansing.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:04:15

just I'm just getting the image of you just like shooting a fly with salt and then just like doing it over, but then also just like going gangbusters and like doing it all around your house.

Eric: 1:04:28

Like it's a confetti cannon.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:04:29

All right.

Matt: 1:04:32

Eric's going to buy me a salt shotgun.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:04:34

No he's not. Do not do that.

Eric: 1:04:37

Eric, there will be no salt shotguns in this house.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:04:39

Thank you, if you purchase it, do not purchase it. It will not end up in this house longer. Matt bought seven fly swatters a few weeks ago so I don't agree.

Matt: 1:04:50

Lindsey, lindsey, it was a pack that was like six dollars okay, but we didn't need seven fly swatters.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:04:59

Also, the man hand hand delivered it to matt. Actually we were like getting in the car and the delivery man was like are you matthew shay?

Matt: 1:05:06

and matt was like I thought I was about to be served.

Eric: 1:05:10

You're about to be. You're about to be handed letters from me in the year 1855 yeah, like very good reference here anytime oh, I talked right 1885, but yeah 1880 okay, oh, can we?

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:05:23

I'm hungry for dinner.

Eric: 1:05:24

This is dinner time can we do my breakfast? Oh, you're about to correct us on an empty stomach.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:05:29

God, buckle up, matthew well, let's not get crazy. I've eaten today, um okay, so uh, I have only two corrections for this that's it you told us you had a correction corner. We only fucked up twice well, no, that I didn't say that, let's be very clear I did not say you only fucked up twice. I said there's two things that I can correct you oh, okay, you're fucking up is immortal and happens and will happen for time immemorial, frankly and also for these fuck-ups.

Eric: 1:05:58

Yeah, matt, I'm more interested in the. You know, quantity is one factor but volume is another. So let's see how the severity of these fuck-ups go on.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:06:08

Quality is not a concern to you.

Eric: 1:06:10

No, that's what I'm getting at. Quantity is like I might fuck up a whole bunch, but if it's like a little thing, oh my god, Poach, it's so amazing that you say that.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:06:21

Oh good, it's so amazing that you say that. It's so amazing that you say that. Oh good, it's so amazing that you say that. So we'll start with the first one, which occurred during episode 75, long time ago, um, which is titled mosh pit lifeguard nice um, again, I'll give you the time code so you can go back and edit it in.

Eric: 1:06:36

Thank, you, lindsey, thank you. He says as if he's editing this.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:06:44

Okay, On Mosh Pit Lifeguard. If you recall, you are talking about Clifford the Big Red Dog. Yes, indeed, and you're trying to guess how tall he is. Like you're sort of trying to figure out, like, what his height is as compared to a house. Blah, blah, blah. And at one point, at 36 minutes and 50 seconds specifically, you say that you estimate that he's only about two years old and that in the next few years he will double in size, making him, by your calculations, roughly 50 feet tall.

Matt: 1:07:14

If he's only two, he's still a puppy, still a little puppy. He's going to get bigger. He's going to get bigger. So if we assume he doubles in size, that's 50 feet before he stands up. Oh yeah, oh wow. So how tall is a story? 10 feet, I think. How tall is a story?

Eric: 1:07:35

Well, that reminds me of this. One time I was telling stories 14 feet actually, oh, okay, okay.

Matt: 1:07:42

So just some real quick math here. Telling stories 14 feet actually, oh, okay, okay. So just some real quick math here. That's three and a half stories tall.

Eric: 1:07:51

Hell yeah.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:07:53

Most dogs are fully grown by the age of two.

Eric: 1:07:57

Oh, no, that makes sense.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:07:59

So, yeah, your dog is not growing when it's five. So by that estimation you have unfairly and, I would suggest, unjustly doubled Clifford the Big Red Dog to be 50 feet high, when, if you're estimating, he's two and he's already 25 feet. That is probably as big as he's going to get. Now I did some research and male dogs can grow a little bit past their second birthday, but not significantly. So that is my correction for episode 75.

Eric: 1:08:29

Okay, Okay, fair, fair, that does change the calculus on a lot of things he might. He's less of a kaiju at that point, more of a.

Matt: 1:08:39

You know, yes, I house a house, a house with legs a house with legs, you know, without pulling up a bunch of tabs to defend myself, I will accept the correction in theory and we thank you.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:08:55

I want to be clear. I do not come on to Lindsay's Cor's correction corner for rebuttal.

Eric: 1:09:01

Very clear oh, I'm I'm sorry, this wasn't a dialogue thank you, dr. Bar is what I meant to say I want to be as cool as you when I grow up, dr lindsey bar if I wanted an argument, I'd save this conversation for off the podcast.

Matt: 1:09:22

Thank you, yes.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:09:25

Okay. So thank you so much for saying that. Okay, on episode 87, I don't have a time code for you, because thank you so much for leading up to this, eric. This error is so voluminous and so frequent that it would be hard to put a time code on it, and I want to suggest that perhaps you make this mistake in episode 88 as well, but I don't think you do. I actually listened quite closely the way I saw. That suggests I don't always listen closely, but I listened quite closely to episode 88.

Eric: 1:10:00

No, tip no tip, no, tip Okay.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:10:03

So let me remind you, episode 87 is your episode, before the IKEA episode.

Matt: 1:10:09

Indeed Okay.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:10:10

So when you're talking about going to IKEA, I believe you both make this mistake, but it does start with poach.

Matt: 1:10:17

It always does.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:10:19

You continually refer to an umlaut. Yes, that you're going to see in Ikea.

Juniper: 1:10:26

Yes.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:10:27

I'm so happy to tell you, as a fellow German speaker term used very loosely it is not an umlaut in the Swedish language. In fact, in the Swedish language they have 29 letters because they have added a lowercase a, a capital A and an O with what we look like umlauts over it. But that is not an umlauted letter. That is in fact its own unique letter to the Swedish language. An umlaut is a modifier of an already existing letter because in the German language, as you know as a German speaker, it shifts pronunciation.

Eric: 1:10:59

Yes, it does.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:11:07

A becomes A, o becomes right, because it's not a different letter. It's shifting the space, the place in your mouth that you're saying, the word, the letter, fascinating that's fucking dope I would.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:11:15

I have to learn something. Yes, so what is the word? So umlauts are used often in Germanic languages, and in German in particular, and if you say a word with a German origin in Swedish, you would use an umlaut. But that's only a word of German origin, right, like if you're like Museli, right Like, that would be. That's a German origin word, so you'd use the umlaut. But the umlaut is the diacritic language modifier. It's like the change it stands for, change sound, but the actual thing, like the two dots above the word are called umlautzeichen, umlautzeichen. I learned that when I was doing research for this Hell yeah, give it up, which sounds like umlaut sign.

Juniper: 1:12:00

Give it up. Indeed, it up, roll it in roll it in.

Eric: 1:12:04

Yeah, there it is.

Matt: 1:12:06

There it is dr lindsey parr how fucking cool yes, thank, we've all learned something. Yeah, you've brought actual knowledge onto the podcast, which is a welcome change.

"Werner Herzog": 1:12:23

Yeah, yeah.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:12:25

It's just not you two fools, Just banging skulls together saying things.

"Werner Herzog": 1:12:28

All right.

Eric: 1:12:29

All right, let's be careful, that's that's our bread, and butter. Once again, you have raised the bar Nice. Thank you, nice, eric, well done.

Matt: 1:12:36

Thank, Thank you Nice. Eric Thank you so much Well done, thank you.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:12:39

Thank you. Yeah, those are the only two corrections I had, but again, one was like a tried and true correction, the other again too voluminous to really quantify. So you know, maybe I don't want you to do this, matt, because it feels like a lot of work and you already do a lot of work. But you know, in a podcast where they had like a dedicated producer, like a supercut of all the umlauts, that would be a lot of things to supercut, because it does happen a lot.

Eric: 1:13:09

Frankly Lindsay, I agree with you. Oh, you do do you.

Matt: 1:13:14

We're on the scene. We will be on the scene.

Matt: 1:13:17

We will be in those sofas I'm going to be rifling through their umlauts like it's my fucking job, and then we just walk through the Ikea answering the questions that we get, yeah and commenting on the umlauts we see hey everybody. Editor Matt here. So sorry to interrupt the supercut, but that's actually it, that's it, that's it. It's twice, it's two times and we don't say umlaut once in the entire IKEA episode, at least according to our transcripts. Just thought I'd pop in here and make it clear.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:13:56

Those are my corrections. Thank you so much for joining me on this version of Wendy's Correction Corner. Again thank you for the space. No rebuttals, no questions, and I assume no notes.

Matt: 1:14:05

Too true. You are indeed free to go.

Eric: 1:14:08

Yes, you are, oh, already. Well, you charge by the minute. So, yes, please go.

Matt: 1:14:15

Absolutely yes. Thank you once again for stopping by.

Eric: 1:14:28

And you know two corrections over however many episodes it's been since the last time you corrected us. I'd say, Eric, we got a pretty good average, we're pretty good average, and Dr Lindsay.

Dr. Lindsey Barr: 1:14:37

Barr, cannot wait to see you, assuredly within the next few weeks, assuredly, assuredly. Delight to see you, uh, on the podcast in these cute little boxes. I'm gonna go, don't record for too much longer because I'm hungry.

Eric: 1:14:50

Bye, bye, yes I always feel so cleansed after after lindsey's correction I agree with you. I've been made right with the lord.

Matt: 1:14:57

I agree with you, eric, and I also agree with my wife that I am hungry, so I do think it's time to wrap things up. We'll be back with Google Gripes before too long, our next episode. We're going to have a very special guest joining us, so we will be jumping yet another episode before we get back to Google Gripes, but nevertheless, that's coming back very soon, don't you worry. Oh yeah, babies, but that being said, I do think that'll about do it. That'll about do it this episode, if you didn't ask for this. Before we completely go, though, I do want to mention once again that we do have that new fan mail text message feature in the body of our episode description. It says click here to send us a text message. Go ahead, click that.

Matt: 1:15:52

You can submit questions that way, but of course, you can submit questions to us on YouDidN'tAskForThis at gmailcom that's all spelled out or on social media on instagram, twitter, facebook and now tiktok at. You didn't ask pod, that's the letter. You didn't ask pod. That tiktok is brand new. You can see some video clips, as of this recording there's only one, but uh, I'll. I'll put together some more and throw those up there, unless you're.

Eric: 1:16:21

You are so moved, poach, I you know it'll be my first I've never, never, you've never ticked or talked I've ticked a talk but I've never shared it, I've never like promoted I've done. I've ticked exactly one talk there you go just to see what it felt like.

Matt: 1:16:38

I don't think I've seen your one TikTok.

Eric: 1:16:39

This was like five or six years ago, really yeah.

Matt: 1:16:43

I'll have to go search for it. Yeah, and you can do the same by following those breadcrumbs from the at you didn't ask pod, tiktok account. That's the letter. You didn't ask pod. On TikTok, twitter, facebook, instagram, all over the place. You can send in those questions, send in those neighborhood scuffles that you might see on your next door app or whatever local legends you want to send in. What else, eric?

Eric: 1:17:12

Gang, I don't know how many times I have to say it. You could send anything to us.

Matt: 1:17:17

Truly.

Eric: 1:17:18

If the fancy takes you, we might discover something cool.

Matt: 1:17:22

Absolutely.

Eric: 1:17:23

We might discover something about ourselves.

Matt: 1:17:25

We've hit such a lucky streak with the thought line recently, oh my, God we actually have a backlog. This is great If you have recently submitted a question on the thought line. Don't think we didn't get it, we got it.

Juniper: 1:17:40

Oh, we got you.

Matt: 1:17:41

We got it, it's coming. We're peppering them through. But, all means, send us a voicemail with your question. That's 410-929-5329. Leave us a message. You don't have to talk to a human, you just have to listen to me for like 30 seconds.

Eric: 1:17:58

For, like easily, 30 seconds God forbid.

Matt: 1:18:01

I be brief, brief, so listen to that. And, um, leave us a message. We'll play it on the show, probably, unless you say something you know, horribly problematic. Yeah, eric, did I miss anything? Not, not a dang thing. Well then, I have one thing to say, and that's from all of us here. You didn't ask for this. My name's matcha, my name's eric poach, and listen.

Eric: 1:18:24

You didn't ask, but legitimately. As soon as I hang up this call, I'm gonna walk around the corner and go. I'm gonna go guzzle some glizzies. I'm gonna murder some dogs. That, out of context, is a horrible sentence.

Matt: 1:18:38

I'm gonna eat a lot of hot dog product aka oh no, I, I think we got it, eric, I think we got it the first time I don't like this game, no more I think you've dug yourself a hole and now it's time for you to stay in it. Okay, okay, all right, all right. Is that the end of the humor?

Eric: 1:18:55

yeah, I'm pretty sure that's it.

Matt: 1:18:57

All right, we'll see ourselves out then, okay.