A new year means one thing: our second annual Bingo Card drafting. Find out what the candidates are for this year's 2024 YDAFT Bingo Cards...and submit your own! Just use this link to download the template, drag your selection of choices, and submit it to us at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com, or on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at @udidntaskpod.
https://www.canva.com/design/DAF4wYXCCd8/atanVFzr_KkTgJbdoTa3Dg/view?utm_content=DAF4wYXCCd8&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link&utm_source=publishsharelink&mode=preview
As always, you can submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!
Submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!
A new year means one thing: our second annual Bingo Card drafting. Find out what the candidates are for this year's 2024 YDAFT Bingo Cards...and submit your own! Just use this link to download the template, drag your selection of choices, and submit it to us at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com, or on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at @udidntaskpod.
https://www.canva.com/design/DAF4wYXCCd8/atanVFzr_KkTgJbdoTa3Dg/view?utm_content=DAF4wYXCCd8&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link&utm_source=publishsharelink&mode=preview
As always, you can submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!
Submit your least pressing questions, local legends, definitive rankings, neighborhood group drama, and whatever else you want us to cover at youdidntaskforthis@gmail.com or @udidntaskpod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
You can also leave us a voicemail on The Thoughtline at (410) 929-5329 and we might just play it on the show!
Got pictures taken to the back of my eyeballs.
Matt:By a professional or by Jerry in the only the best, Matthew. Only the best, hasn't answered the question yet.
Eric:No, I needed new glasses because my current pair are, to borrow the medical phrase, dog shit. They're like five or six years old. I went to an eye doctor to get my vision rechecked because it's been five or six years since it's been assessed. I'm happy to report my vision still pretty much baller, nice, I have like a baby. I have like the baby is baby prescription. I'm like right on the edge of you don't need glasses and you should wear these so you don't get headaches. Sure, so that all. Well, apparently I have superhuman depth perception. They gave me like a depth perception test and like it was like a series of times, like it was like all right, now, look at this lie. Like I had to put like 3D glasses on and like, look at lines of like dots and I had to tell them which dot was different than the rest because it would be like sticking out a little bit further. Like it was she was like all right, line one.
Eric:I was like bam. Line two bam. I was just like rattling off the answers and she takes me all the way to line 10. She's like all right, line 10. I'm like this one. She was like interesting, no one ever goes that far. Whoa, they don't tell me more, please let this be the moment. And I learned I have superpowers of perception. Yeah, sadly it's not. She was like oh no, that's just really neat. Yeah, cool, cool.
Matt:No, the fun part you can just see Is that it.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, I can, I can see. I can see really fucking good Good. The fun part, though, came when they wanted to image the back of my eyes so they could like look at my optic nerve and all that, yeah, so they gave me two options.
Eric:That this is how they delivered them to me. Mind you, I came in to this appointment this is yesterday at like 1245. I was like knock this out and then I've got like the rest of my day, you know, to do stuff. Yeah, Fucking. Option one, she's like OK, for this we would need to dilate your eyes, which means you will have blurred vision and light sensitivity for the next like five or six hours. Right, or there's a machine sitting right in front of you that you can just put your eye up on that. We just take a picture of the back of your eyeball and saw the digital.
Matt:I was like I feel like that's the normal way.
Eric:Yeah, she's like that's 50 bucks extra. I was like what is that? Yeah, the first one involves putting chemicals in my eye and using a fucking analog like like microscope camera system and that is somehow cheaper than me just using the big electrical box that I just put my eye up to. They're like listen, eric.
Matt:I don't know what to tell you, but I simply do not.
Eric:Needless to say, I shelled out the 50 bucks. I wasn't looking to have the rest of my day kind of fucked up.
Matt:OK, so is this where you're going to tell me it discovered something sinister in the back of your eyes?
Eric:No, I will say two things. One experiencing the back of the eyeball photographing machine did make me feel like I was in Blade Runner. It was very. It was like I can get that Like.
Matt:Green Lake. I get how you'd feel that way specifically actually.
Eric:Yeah, it was very fun to. The backs of my eyeballs are pristine. I got so many compliments about the backs of my eyeballs.
Matt:When you said that just now, you closed your eyes. Yes, if you were going to spin them around in there and take a look, so Back of my eyeballs.
Eric:Hold on, let me check.
Matt:It looked like you were saying like I got to talk about the back of my eyeballs and I just want to enjoy them for a moment.
Eric:I opened them. You just see the backs of my optic nerves sticking out. They just stick out completely no, but the the backs of my eyeballs do look like a prog metal album cover. It's just like this beautiful ocean of vessels and veins, yeah, and it looks like a mix between the clouds of the universe and a womb back there.
Matt:Nice, very good, you have that, you have that. I womb going on, huh Got that.
Eric:I womb. Nice yeah, nice yeah. So you know all the better to see you with my darling.
Matt:OK.
Eric:Is that just?
Matt:clarify, that's your button.
Eric:I was like maybe it'll sound way better if I say it instead of just thinking Right.
Matt:Well, hello everybody, and welcome to a new year of you didn't ask for this the podcast answering life's least pressing questions. My name's Matt Jay.
Eric:My name's Eric Poach. New Year, new me baby.
Matt:Oh yeah, what's on the docket for you? You got some resolutions to show.
Eric:Oh, oh yeah, I'm going to Well there's no way you do.
Matt:There's no way. Whatever you're about to say, I'm going to part. I'm going to part the curtain a little bit. Folks, it is December 10th when we are recording this episode. There's no earthly way Eric Poach has thought of New Year's resolutions.
Eric:Matt, I could have been lounging in my, in my, in my armchair. You know, I'm just fucking sifting, brandy, and thinking of my resolutions. I could have been.
Matt:That's what I would like this podcast to be in my line of thinking. Yeah, I would love us to be able to sit back into two armchairs with our microphones like two philosopher kings like to the philosopher kings that we are, are we not lords?
Eric:We are lords of sea, land that's my resolution going to 2024. Hold on to my lordship at all costs.
Matt:We did receive our lordships, Eric. You need to get a new frame so we can take a fun photo of them.
Eric:Yeah, so.
Matt:You want to take it up with the?
Eric:I do, I do. That's what I'm struggling with, man. So just again we're going to part the curtain. Behind the curtain, my lordship from sea land arrived. My certificate of lordship, beautiful, prince Michael, signature upon it immaculate. The frame they sent me crumbled into little broken bits of dust in my hand.
Matt:It is a cheap frame and let me be clear, we ordered framed, embossed, signed by Prince Michael lordships. I ordered the premium experience for the low, low cost of seventy five, seventy five dollars, seventy five USD US denominational dollars, that's correct, and we receive. You received your diploma of lordship and a pile of scraps. Yes, I received my lordship and a frame, but they were not together. They were I had to do the framing myself, prince Michael, and I think I say again, with all due respect to the prince oh yeah, are we not?
Eric:lords? Are we not lords? But Matt, you know that was a power move on the princess part.
Matt:You know, I want to keep us in check, yeah yeah, he's like do not forget whence you came.
Eric:but welcome, welcome into my bosom.
Matt:Did you see any of the Sea Land? 60 minute documentary Biden chance.
Eric:Yes, yes I did, yes, remarkable.
Matt:When I shared my local legend a few episodes ago about Sea Land, I did not realize that those silos were totally full of like rooms and stairs.
Matt:Oh yeah hollow and. I should have.
Matt:I thought there was just like this little base on top that was that was the nation, and no, there's the National Cathedral, which is a room, and then there's the jail, which is a room, but they have all these things and they have a. They have a line on the wall. That's like you are going below sea level, which is very nerve wracking.
Eric:Yeah, that's was like. I'm not super envious of the people who get the hollow no base rooms, because, if I don't think anyone does if Sea Land goes down, they'll be the first to know. No, I mean.
Matt:Sea Land's Instagram feed. It seems like there's like three or four dudes that live in Sea Land. I'm going to say full time in quotes with an asterisk yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think they spend a great deal of time at Sea Land. I'm not sure it's their permanent residence. Oh man, Anyway, didn't have becoming lords on our 2023 bingo card Now did we? No, we did not. Good segue.
Matt:Thank you, folks.
Matt:We are at a very special time. This is our first ever episode that we are dedicating in advance to one thing and one thing only, and that is naming, for we decided last year when we answered the question, the simple question, what is on our 2023 bingo card? And we took the whole episode. We decided live, that it was a new tradition, yep. And now we are back for the first true traditional formation, the formation of our 2024 bingo cards. Now, here we are, invoking the deep magic.
Matt:As I've already mentioned, there are 21 days left in the year of 2023. When we are recording this episode. We we have a busy schedule with the holidays and everything coming up, so we're getting a little head of the game. So I say all that to say, eric, I'd like to do a final check in with you yes, our 2023 bingo cards, because there are some additions that we haven't set on show that should be checked off, and we're going to share them with you now, folks. So, eric, let's, let's take a look at your cards. Eric, on your bingo card, I see one more item that we had not marked off yet, and that is Pete Davidson dates a new smoke show, because he did start dating somebody else a few months ago and it went completely unnoticed to us.
Eric:Ah, how are we we got to stay more involved in Pete's life.
Matt:I mean, we should keep you know tabs on him more than than we all.
Eric:Yeah, we should like follow him, or something.
Matt:So he started dating Madeline Klein in September of 2023 and seen again in October 23. So that's officially dating as far as I'm concerned. Oh, yeah, yeah, we can mark it down, we can mark it off, don't you agree?
Eric:Uh, hard to agree.
Matt:She looks to be like a lovely, lovely person and is objectively a smoke show, Like now gorgeous, of course, and so, eric, that puts you in a very interesting position, because, again, I might have to put a put in if, should, this and I'm going to say, unfortunately happens. But right now, eric, you are one square away from a bingo.
Matt:Are you fucking kidding?
Matt:me. You have in your second line there, alien contact and acknowledgement, got it. You daft celebrity guest, anthony Conway, emmy winner Check Pete Davidson dates a smoke show Checked. And then, at the end of the row, you got Twitter. Dies are rebranded, it's now X, of course, and in the middle, eric Morgan Freeman dies.
Eric:Oh God, no, no, matt, no, not like this, not like this.
Matt:So if Morgan Freeman and we're going to assume lives, Eric, you did not get a bingo, I in totality you got three, four, five, six. You got six things on your bingo card and you got one thing wrong. We both did. The Simpsons announced end and they announced two more seasons, so definitely got that.
Eric:I got to check up on Morgan right now.
Matt:You check up on Morgan. All you want buddy, but what I'm saying to you listeners is who are listening to this in the new year, we, at the time we're recording Morgan Freeman is alive and well and we hope he will still be.
Eric:Oh my God, yes, I've never wanted to lose bingo more.
Matt:But if he's not, we're going to put a put in right fucking here. Otherwise we're continuing with the show. There's the reveal, of course. That brings me to my bingo card for 2023. And I have two new additions. Pete Davidson dates a smoke show, also on my list, doesn't particularly help me in any way. I'm not particularly close. I'm I'm two away in three different direction, four different directions, but I'm not one away anywhere. The other thing that I have, and although it didn't technically happen yet, I do have major sports team moves and of course, the Oakland Athletics, officially, will be moving to Las Vegas. So, although they haven't physically moved yet, that was approved, despite it being super controversial and shouldn't be happening, but it is. They will be the Las Vegas Athletics soon enough. So I think I get that one, I think you get that one.
Eric:Did they used to be the Raiders?
Matt:No, that's a football team. That's a football team.
Eric:What sport are we discussing presently?
Matt:Baseball.
Eric:Oh, that one, that one.
Matt:OK, so mostly referred to as the Oakland A's, if that helps you.
Eric:But Oakland A's? Yeah, because athletics is not the laziest, the least imaginative team name I've ever heard in my life. Oh really.
Matt:Not like the Cleveland Browns.
Eric:No, because, like the Browns, at least had to think of something outside of being a sport. This just stayed right. We are athletics, yeah.
Matt:I guess so.
Eric:Not the Oakland baseball players. The.
Matt:Oakland A's. There is, of course, the New York Metropolitan's. That's not particularly original, I think.
Eric:Yeah, it's like they thought about it for two seconds, like Oakland Athletics.
Matt:I guess, so we're from.
Eric:Oakland we're athletic.
Matt:I just love that I could let you discover that the Oakland Athletics are in fact a team right in front of my eyes.
Eric:This is a joyous moment for me.
Matt:I'm sure that it is. I'm sure that it is. Of course, these days I've been so heavily into soccer Most clubs are just called some variation of city. They're based in football club, yeah, so you know. They decided to cut out some of the fanfare, anyway. So that is where we land. Unless there's any changes, that is it. We did not get a bingo in the first year that we tried to do this and I have to say, eric, we put out a contest for anyone who wanted to submit their own bingo cards.
Eric:Yes.
Matt:Nobody has given us a successful bingo card. Yeah, so that said, nobody else got bingo either. You didn't tell us. If one of you who submitted a bingo card are going to tell us by the end of the year, we will put a put in right here. Otherwise, assume the answer is no. Yeah, yeah, so, so we will.
Eric:I like this new thing we're doing yeah.
Matt:That we're just allowing ourselves to correct ourselves in the future.
Eric:Making space, making space for growth, yes, indeed.
Matt:It's a new year, new us baby, new editing policies, so so so there we go. So that all said it could be. You know, now that we're doing it live, I do feel like maybe 20 days for the first episode of the new year might be too far in advance, but but oh well here we go, because these events could still happen. They could still happen, one of which is our center square. That Yedaph reaches the top five on Good Pod's overall is what we said.
Eric:We have been dancing with this one, Matthew.
Matt:And we have been dancing. We have been in the top 10 in the comedy chart many times. We've been in the top like 15 of the overall chart once or twice, but we had yet to break in. I think even once we were in the top five, top 10 for overall and, spitting this, I think we were in seventh. I think the highest we've gotten is seventh overall on Good Pod's for a week and but that's not the bingo. The bingo was top five, Eric. I say we keep that same series square.
Eric:Keep it there. We keep it right where it is. Stays right, the fuck there.
Matt:So that means, Eric, that we need 24 other candidates to fill out the Yedaph bingo card and once again, folks, we're going to get into it. Here we, Eric and I have, we've prepped some suggestions. This go round.
Eric:Yeah, last time it was, it was very dynamic, it was very interesting, and that we had added out so much dead silence as the silence. Thought awkwardly at each other.
Matt:Just thinking time had to be cut left and right, but this time we came a little more prepared. We'll leave it at that and we have some options to go through. I'm sure we'll discover some new ones as we go, but I do want to mention once again if you want to fill out your own bingo card, the link will be in these show notes You'll fill it out on a little Canva thing, just like you did last year, and as long as you submit that to us by the end of January 2024, you will. You will have a successful bingo submission. There are prizes if they were to win the bingo. Oh, we said automatic guest ship on the show.
Eric:Yeah yeah, Automatic guest ship on the show. Well, can we? Can we abuse our powers as Lords of Sea Land? Somehow? Can we appoint them? Not sure.
Matt:I don't actually know what powers we really have.
Eric:I don't think any. But then again, how does? How does one gain power unless they're willing to take his Matthew Very?
Matt:good, eric, very good but these are but whispers.
Eric:I jest, of course.
Matt:Now? Yes, of course. So let's, we'll just leave it at that right now. You will win a guest ship on the show and something else that maybe we'll think of by the end of this episode.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll record myself doing something very stupid for you.
Matt:Yeah, sure, we'll do. We'll do an off cameo cameo for you. Yeah, how about that? We'll we'll go back to 2010 and record your outgoing message for you. Okay, eric, should we start getting into this?
Eric:We should. And one more kind of preliminary thing, matt what is your, what was your philosophy as you approached your potential 2024? I think it's important for us to kind of talk about, like where we come from. Thank you.
Matt:Thank you for the question I I'm glad you asked, cause I did give this some thought, cause, where I started with and this is something I wanted to mention before we get into it I wanted to begin by looking at some of the major events that will be happening in 2023 or in 2024, excuse me and make some predictions around them. Now. That said, perhaps for us, eric I know we have a bit of an international litter listenership, but the majority of our listeners are here in the good old us of a we have a rather important presidential election coming up. Oh, yeah, we do, and I say to you, eric, that I think we should not predict any winners or losers.
Eric:Not even fucking touching that.
Matt:Let's not joke around with what could be legitimately and no jokes involved the downfall of American democracy.
Eric:I look I can make my peace with potentially murdering Morgan Freeman via bingo.
Matt:Yeah, oh, we're going to kill people this year too. I've got my nominees.
Eric:I don't think I could handle being right about anything having to do with politics.
Matt:I don't want to, I don't, I don't want to be wrong. You know what I mean.
Eric:I don't want to be wrong, I don't want to see wrong, I just want.
Matt:We know what you want. We all know what we want.
Eric:I just want to party all night long.
Matt:We don't need to necessarily say it, and it's also not what we necessarily we want so much as what we need to happen.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, oh also, in case you're joining us for the first time, let's just get this out of the way. Bleeding heart liberal. Like it's not like. I'm not going to talk about who I want to win in the lecture, or just I'm just not calling any shots.
Matt:Yeah, let's get it crystal clear here we're riding for Biden. Oh yeah, but we're, we're just sort of. You know we got in the car. You know what I mean. It was the let's put it this way, it was the last Uber out of town. Okay, yeah, we have to be involved on that train.
Eric:But yeah, hashtag blue, no matter who baby, so anyway we will weekend at Bernie's Biden's self across the finish line.
Matt:Hey, we have to you know what, if it's President Harris by the time we get over to November, so be it. But that's that. And this is very, very important. Eric, that is not my death predicted. I have a predicted death, and so do you, I do. We determined last year that we needed to predict that a celebrity would die, and I say once again Antonio, bring in the Ave Maria just for a little bit. Yeah, I just want to have another moment to apologize to Tony Bennett, who I strategically picked as being a old and sickly man to die in 2023.
Matt:You killed him.
Matt:I don't know for sure that my picking you to die is what killed you, but I do, you did. We don't. The science isn't in.
Eric:But that said, his last words were matcha rest matcha ellipses.
Matt:He didn't finish it.
Eric:They wrote the ellipses, they quoted the ellipses.
Matt:And he raised a fist, but then he opened his hand and then, of course, dropped him. Yeah, yeah, but he opened his hand, which is to say, perhaps it was extending in friendship, perhaps I released him from a burdensome existence.
Eric:Yeah, because he really fucking hated being Tony Bennett. I tell you that he just woke up every day. Uh-oh, what's the new? He's fucking just singing about how much he despises being a world acclaimed singer beloved by millions.
Matt:Oh man, sorry about it, tony. So that's my philosophy. I started with some set events and some things that I knew we would talk about. We needed I needed to have a death. I made a short list, I whittled it down to my pick and we'll get into that when we get into that God that makes so much sense for you. Some other things I did. The Olympics are happening this summer, so I have some Olympic related guesses as well.
Matt:Yes, yes, yes.
Matt:And then I thought about what were some of the significant moments that happened over the course of 2023 that were, like you know, fucking left field. You know what I mean? Yeah, and one thing that came to mind and I even, I have to say, thought of this one it was happening, but the the Ocean Gate implosion, of course, was a worldwide phenomenon. Everyone was talking about it. Certainly didn't have that on our bingo card. So I tried to think of like things like that too, what was your philosophy?
Eric:Spaghetti at the wall, Matthew.
Matt:Yeah, I got to that.
Eric:I'm a real shoot for the moon kind of person. I like to predict shit. I'm like let's just see if it happens.
Matt:Yeah, I got a couple like that.
Eric:Let's just see what shakes out I did.
Matt:I kind of Is that the majority of your list?
Eric:I would say majority of the list is stuff that was just like all right. I would say like it's about half spaghetti at the wall. The other half is like variations on a theme, like like in that I looked like similar to you. I looked back at last year I was like all right, which of these can I tweak and which of these get a sequel? If you feel me.
Matt:I have a couple of those too, but I think this, I think this ends up being a very good mix, because I think you'll have a lot more spaghetti at the wall stuff and I'll have a lot more you know thing guesses surrounding things that are going to take place, you know, yeah so, yeah so where?
Eric:should we start, Eric? Do we want to start with our celebrity death? Do we just want to get that out of the way?
Matt:Let's get it out of the way. Okay, let's get it out of the way.
Matt:All right, let's just let's just clear the whole line and listen. As the, as the person who unfortunately was correct in their, in their prediction and and may or may not have contributed to the death of Tony Bennett, I realized that I picked somebody who was knocking on, knock, knock, knock and on Heaven's door as it, as it was already, and in a way I don't think that's super fair. So I've picked somebody who, medically speaking, shouldn't die, you know, is not theoretically close to death.
Eric:He is a young person. So you, you're, you're taking the the hot. If you were betting on this, you'd get, like it, 800 to one.
Matt:Something like that. Yeah, I have. I went down to two nominees, and the reason I went down to two is, I have to say, eric, because I did win. Do you feel as though I need to make it harder by picking two, or should I just have the one?
Eric:We should just stick to predicting the shedding of the mortal coil to one like to, you know, to one. Ok, I feel all right?
Matt:Well, in that case, I have my pick. I went back and forth. I made a lengthy list, probably 10 names that I whittled down and I purposely, as I said before, don't think this person will die.
Eric:I purposely picked somebody who shouldn't die and you do not want them to die.
Matt:Because Tony? No, I don't, because Tony Bennett was. You wanted him to die? No, it's. Tony Bennett was not necessarily a shock death. Ok yeah, matthew Perry, for example, was a shock death, very shocking. No one was ready for that, no, so I have picked a. And even Morgan Freeman, who, as we, as far as we know, is still alive.
Eric:Keep holding out Morgan, keep holding out Daddy passed, though.
Matt:would that really have been super shocking.
Eric:Not terribly.
Matt:So I've picked somebody who would be a shock death.
Eric:OK.
Matt:And I have chosen. Who did you pick? I have chosen International Superstar Justin Bieber. I have selected Justin Bieber for death. Consideration by the Grim Reaper.
Eric:Okay, I died again.
Matt:Listen.
Eric:No, no, it speaks for itself.
Matt:Listen, there's a lot of anti-bebes out there. I'm not saying I'm not even saying I'm a fan, but I got nothing against the man. I don't. He's a father now. I don't want him to pass away.
Eric:Want him to live and thrive.
Matt:I want him to live and thrive.
Eric:Put that energy out into the universe.
Matt:I won't be pleased if he passes. I won't be. I mean I'll get another bingo square but I won't be pleased about it. I'll mark it off just the same, but I'll do so mournfully.
Eric:Oh variation. Can I introduce a variation?
Matt:If one of us gets our death.
Eric:Bingo. We have to write a Obituary, not an obituary. We have to do what's it called at a funeral? A?
Matt:eulogy.
Eric:A eulogy we have to do a eulogy for the person and we have to apologize.
Matt:I kind of did a eulogy to Tony Bennett.
Eric:Yeah, we played.
Matt:Ave Maria before.
Eric:We did play Ave Maria. Hey, can we get that one more time?
Matt:Yeah, bring it back, Antonio.
Eric:Yeah, this is nice.
Matt:Yeah, so, but we did. I forget what episode it was. Of course I did say a little thing about Tony Bennett dying and feeling bad, but it wasn't quite a eulogy. I like the idea of we should celebrate their life. We celebrate their life because we're not trying to kill these people.
Eric:We're not trying to kill these people.
Matt:But just practically speaking, celebrities will die this year and we just are trying to guess which one. And now, eric, I think you've done a great job beating around the bush. Who are you killing, buddy?
Eric:So I'll preface this with. Matt made me do this, I did not.
Matt:We established this last year. He bullied me into it. He threatened me extensively.
Eric:if I didn't pick someone, you had a whole year to decide. He said you have to know what it's like, eric, to feel the rush of holding someone's life in your hands.
Matt:Well, I do think it would benefit you if you Nothing it out. I do think you would feel a certain kind of way.
Eric:Okay. With that being said, I Can you really?
Matt:call yourself a lord if you have to take it's famous person's life. Ha, ha, ha ha ha, god damn Lord poach. The court demands an answer.
Eric:I have a. This is actually relevant. I'll just get to it. You know who?
Matt:I picked. This is actually relevant. I'll get to it in a second.
Eric:I was going to say you're going to need a house, shea needs a reins of castamere. But about you? Killing House Bennett and it's appropriate, because I picked George RR Martin. Oh no, you didn't. I was like what would piss off the most people.
Matt:No, not before Winds of Winter.
Matt:I Listen. I'm already prepared for him to die before a dream of spring.
Matt:But not Winds of Winter no, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Eric:So I picked that for that reason, and I also picked it though this made me feel better about it If anyone was going to subvert my expectations by not dying.
Matt:Okay.
Eric:JRR. It would be JRR Martin George.
Matt:RR Martin this way.
Eric:I win, no matter what. Either you know he kicks it and a lot of nerds get very upset with me, Of course or he lives up to his name.
Matt:I think it's a good pick. And you know what? In many ways it's an inverse of our picks last year. You know, I think the chances of George RR Martin passing away naturally much higher than our friend the Biebs, so we'll get to it. Okay, so those are the deaths. We got him out of the way. I think that's good. Okay, just knock him out. And in terms of the election, I did have a related pick. There's going to be a sex scandal for a nominee.
Eric:Oh, a sex scandal for a presidential nominee.
Matt:You know, presidential candidate is what I meant to say, oh, presidential candidate, not a nominee. Okay, not a nominee, a candidate, all right, and I'll even double down some. They will drop out because of it.
Eric:Okay, that would be the shocking part at this juncture.
Matt:At this juncture, that's the shocking part.
Eric:I have a, so this isn't related to elections, but this is related to politics and I daresay might become an election issue. It feels like a kind of Hail Mary someone might throw out there just to see who bites. Sure, I have for 2024, a state will attempt to secede from the union. I fucking love it.
Matt:I mean I hate it, but yeah, I think that's great. Do you have a prediction of which state I don't want to get that specific but it was going to be anyone.
Eric:Yeah, I don't think I need to, but my honest prediction it would be Texas would be my like, most likely like I.
Matt:yeah, I have two nominees. Again, these aren't official, I'm just saying if it's going to happen, I think it's going to happen one of two states and I think those two states are Texas, is the obvious front runner, and Washington state, I think, is the other one.
Eric:Okay.
Matt:I know there's like a movement up there to like make it. I think they, I think if and my sister-in-law, Jen, does listen to the show, writes in from time to time, as we know, she's the one who introduced this to me because she lives up in Seattle. I think they call it Cascadia is the idea of like Oregon and Washington, like succeeding from the union, and I think she I don't want to say what her position is on it because I don't officially know, Obviously I'm against it. So don't do that, Don't do that Cascadia people. You know, just keep it as like a just if we could say the quiet part out loud keep it as like a C-landic idea, you know, because like you know, we're not really lords of anything.
Matt:You know what I mean.
Eric:No, no, no, no, it's not actually a country.
Matt:Yeah, it's like a big bit that we want it in on. So like, keep it as a bit you know, keep it as a bit Texas.
Eric:on the other hand, you can go, just go for the out of need you for the out of left field option though California.
Matt:Oh, california has a higher, has a higher, higher, higher, higher higher, higher, higher has a higher GDP than most nations. I'd say if another state's going to do it, it's the sixth highest economy in the world, probably a number two slot that's more likely to go than Washington, not as likely to go as Texas Florida.
Eric:Oh Florida. Yeah, when the fuck would they go? That's, I think that's the only thing that stopped it from happening. It reminds me.
Matt:Well, it would be the easiest to cut off, because if you think about it like Texas is, then the, the nation of Texas, would then be sandwiched between Mexico and the United States and would be this very small country, whereas Florida is already hanging off the end. Like it's so easy to. It's so easy to not go there in the first place.
Eric:I was going to say, if we cut them off we could just wait a couple of decades, it'll be underwater.
Matt:That's what I'm saying. Yeah, it won't be a problem, but it is reminding me of you know, just a few days ago the trailer for Grand Theft Auto 6 finally dropped, and my God does it look gorgeous. Vice City baby. Can't believe we have to wait until 2025. But it does bring us back to Vice City, one of the city, a fictional city. I absolutely could boot up on a PS2 right now, and I know those streets, I know those mean fucking streets.
Matt:I know those streets like the back of my hand. I could get anywhere where you need me to go. But in that I do think Vice City is the best soundtrack of any GTA game 100%. And my favorite radio station in any GTA is always the talk radio stations yes, chatterbox and GTA 3. So fun, specifically VCPR, vice City, public Radio in Vice City. And I will never forget the man who's I forget what the character's name is. I like to think it's all improv, but it's not. But he's talking about Florida and he keeps saying things like what we need is a river.
Matt:A river of hope, a river of freedom, a river that will cut Florida off from the mainland of its oppressors and flowed out to sea. Yes.
Matt:And that is it. That is what it's such a core memory. I know the rest of that speech too.
Eric:Yeah, I think the dude who's talking like, I think was he like an evangelical preacher or something.
Matt:Like he was something like that.
Eric:He led like a basically a cult in the game I do know.
Matt:At one point he says I'm a patriot. I got an orange grove tattooed all over my groin. Oh memories. So Florida, you know what Florida's going to float away? I'm going to say it as a separate thing.
Eric:Florida, florida's. Yeah, so I have a state.
Matt:You have state succeeds A state succeeds.
Eric:You have a state. Physically breaks off of the country. I have a state floats away.
Matt:Yes, absolutely, like a hangmail. Yeah, 100 percent, it's going away, okay. Okay, I have a very topical thing for our next pick. I think an AI I won't say which one, but NAI of some type will become self aware in 2024. Okay, it will become self aware. I will become conscious.
Eric:Love that and God. I could talk about that. That is such a tangent, but I'll save it. I also had an AI one. Oh, what's here? The first major scandal involving falsified evidence generated by AI.
Matt:Okay, major trial, because we did have an art trial.
Eric:Yeah, but now AI art trial. So, major trial someone like there will be a scandal in that we will have like video evidence of someone committing a crime and it will turn out that that was AI generated.
Matt:So major trial with AI created evidence. Is that what we could sum up, sum it up as AI falsified evidence, to be clear.
Eric:Oh, okay, yeah.
Matt:Okay, now, just now, or not just now, but a few weeks ago, a few days ago even, maybe, okay, the Oxford University Press came out with its word of the year, which is, of course, Riz, yes, so, and there's many different, you know publications that do words of the year. I have chosen a word of the year Eric.
Eric:What is your word of the year?
Matt:I think, the word of the year for 2024, and it's not a new word necessarily, although I did look up Gen Z slang that originated in 2023 to see if something maybe is on the rise, and that did make me feel quite old. But what I have chosen is girl boss.
Eric:Girl boss.
Matt:Girl boss. One word will be the word of 2024, for reasons we have yet to really discover.
Eric:I love that. It's making me think of the word of the year.
Matt:I think this is another good tradition we should throw in along with the death, the word of the year.
Eric:I'm going to go. I agree with that. I'm going to go. I love that energy. I'm going to inverse it.
Matt:I want to like like the.
Eric:I'm like, what am I? Oh, hey, girl boss, energy Cool. What is the? What is the chemical opposite of that? Malort?
Matt:Malort.
Eric:Yes, as in Jepsen's malort.
Matt:Okay, so your pick. Malort, spell it for me.
Eric:M-A-L-O-R-T.
Matt:Malort, and is this a real word or are you making a word up?
Eric:Oh, Matt, you haven't had malort.
Matt:No I haven't.
Eric:So everyone who's ever had it and is listening to our show right now is kind of feeling that same mix of giddiness and dread that you feel every time you discover someone hasn't had malort. It is a liquor, it is liqueur. It is famous in the city where it was created, which was Chicago. Like that's where it got hugely popular. It was one of the few things that people could drink during prohibition, because it didn't qualify in the eyes of the law as alcohol.
Matt:I see okay.
Eric:And so it meet.
Matt:By the way, it's malort is a Swedish word, yep, which means wormwood.
Eric:Malort means a lot of things to a lot of people, matt, do you mean? It means literally moth herb. Matt, do you want to know like, what one of the and this has been around for like, like, like malort's been a thing in Chicago since?
Matt:1930s, says Wikipedia, don't it today. Jepsen's malort.
Eric:I have a piece of malort merch that says malort on it and that it has like a motto or a phrase you know, like brand's due, that, like you know Nike just do it, or you know stuff like that.
Matt:I think everyone knows what you're talking about.
Eric:yeah, the one from malort is malort. Tonight's the night you fight your dad and that's an authentic phrase, yeah. So, I cannot wait. Oh, I'm going to have to send you a bottle of malort, so it's the official sponsor of Jepsen's malort is the official sponsor of Festivus Feets of Strength.
Matt:Is that what I'm to understand?
Eric:Yeah, Matt, if we could pull any sponsor to the show on fucking earth, I would want it to be malort. You'd want Jepsen's?
Matt:malort.
Eric:Yep, we're going to do. I'm going to call this shot for a later episode. You and I are going to do a malort tasting.
Matt:Okay, I'm down.
Eric:Yeah, I'll buy you a bottle. Oh, I'll buy you a bottle.
Matt:All right, let's do it.
Eric:All right.
Matt:We can put that on our list of a certain segment that we are not yet ready to reveal but have in the works. I think you know the one. I mean Eric Mm-hmm. Now, so I have girl boss. I do have one other. I won't predict the winner of the presidential election, but Okay. This year, 2023, I went tiny bit viral on TikTok for my coverage of Fat Bear Week and the Cat May National Park, and I'm a big proponent of Fat Bear Week. It's getting bigger every year. I think next year will be the biggest. Yet there is a bear, a fan favorite, out there who is in desperate need of a victory, is always the bridesmaid, never the bride.
Eric:Okay.
Matt:And that's Chunk, and I'm calling it now. Chunk is going. Let me get his number real quick. Of course he has a number Chunk. Chunk has never won. He's been in the finals but he's never won. He's got a giant caboose. I love Chunk. I will say I am reserving the right to on my own personal bracket. When the bracket comes out, once we see what Chunk brought to the table for 2024, I reserve the right to not pick him in my official bracket but in this bingo card while Chunk is off hibernating right now. Before he even starts putting on the pounds, I'm calling the shot he's going to come out with the energy and the intention needed to win Fat Bear Week 2024. And of course I'll be covering it again. On the TikTok, I guess Okay, it was only the one. All the other TikToks I did got a couple hundred, but that was about it. There was only one that blew up and I'm not sure why. I don't understand the algorithm.
Eric:I did also have a TikTok related one. Oh good, Give it to us. It is an alarming new TikTok trend involving milk.
Matt:I think I know what you're talking about, but go ahead.
Eric:No, no, that's it. I just, I just, I wasn't referencing anything. I just think in 2024, there will be an alarming new TikTok trend involving milk, unless there's one already happening.
Matt:I don't think so. I just I saw one with milk not too long ago, that but. But here's the thing we know that Gen Z love the TikTok and we know that Gen Z hate milk. There's it's part of the anti-milk movement that's going on in this country right now that I stand against, even if milk kind of stands against me. But that's besides the point. That's in my own dietary battle.
Eric:Gen Z hate milk, milk, milk, want Gen Z Milk coming for Gen Z.
Matt:Milk will come for Gen Z in 2024.
Eric:Yeah.
Matt:I love it. Okay, so we live in a world where a lot of reboots happen, yes, where a lot of revamped TV shows and sequel series and things like that happen, and a lot of it seems to be surrounding favorite shows from the 90s, and so I have picked the next one. We will see a reboot or a sequel series to Third Rock from the Sun.
Eric:Oh, interesting. Okay, they're going to get the. They're going to get the Frazier treatment.
Matt:They're going to get this Frazier treatment.
Eric:You're going to get Frazier.
Matt:Now, as you all know, I love Frazier very deeply. I've seen every episode of both the actual series and the new one and I will save you some time. The new one is not good. It is not the same show. I will watch every second of it, but I will say the last two episodes better than the previous eight, but it's not. It's not great television. Original Frazier, of course, perfect television. It can't be eclipsed. But this one not so good. But Third Rock is getting the same treatment. Third Rock.
Eric:Okay, okay, I'm with it, I'm fucking with it. What did I have? Let's see, let's just pick one.
Matt:Well I, if you're still going to pick one, I have one sort of related to my reboot.
Matt:Oh, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on.
Matt:There will be a live action gargoyles film.
Eric:Okay, so that's funny, I did find one. I was going to say the one I was about to hit you with is the Magic School Bus will get a live action ad ad. I fucking love it, eric. Yeah.
Matt:Magic School Bus. Magic School Bus, I hope yours comes true.
Eric:Ah, fucking bro, who would play Ms Frizzle? Oh would. Ms Frizzle would be played by Kate McKinnon, right.
Matt:Well, Kate McKinnon plays the new voice in the new Magic School Bus animated series Kate McKinnon does play Ms Frizzle.
Eric:Okay.
Matt:So I think it's only right that she plays her in live action. Ah, that's a no brainer. All right, hit me with another. You had two, hit me with another one.
Eric:Oh, here we go. Let's just veer off into a direction. Lantern flies spotted lantern flies will get uncancelled.
Matt:I okay, Someone's going to come out.
Eric:I don't think Now when I say they get uncancelled, what I mean is because I was actually having a talk with my friend Lauren about this. Yeah, she said, well, new research has emerged in that like that there might be some speed, because the problem with spotted lantern flies aside from the everything is that they currently don't have a natural predator. Nothing had like things they're. They don't look like anything that the things that eat bugs would see as food. So like that's so. The problem is like they have not yet developed a predator here.
Matt:Well, except for us, in the sense that our government did tell us to kill them on site.
Eric:Yes, but I remember her telling me like that that might finally be happening and that species of birds and stuff might actually finally figured out that lantern flies are food. So if we get to that point they might say okay, yeah, I think that's so, don't have to stomp them.
Matt:I I hey, it's on the list, I wrote it down, but I think it is so hard to unopen the can of worms that is instructing a populace to kill a species of bug as soon as you see them.
Eric:Oh yeah, oh yeah. So, for sure.
Matt:I don't think. I think it'll be very hard to get back.
Eric:This was spaghetti at the wall. I love it though.
Matt:Now here's so, before I get to some of my spaghettis, here's another thing that'll happen. Because I didn't want to touch the election, I instead chose to touch the, as of this moment, three criminal trials that former President Trump will be facing the January 6th trial, the classified documents trial and the the hush money trial and I think I'm going to go out and predict the outcomes of these.
Eric:He's calling, if he's pointing to the stands.
Matt:I'm pointing three times three different stands. Three arms Two arms at a time, with my three arms, and I'm saying guilty, guilty, guilty.
Eric:You want a hat trick, I want a hat.
Matt:I want the hat.
Eric:God, don't we all?
Matt:He's got to get one of them. Just statistically he's got to get one of them, but I want all three put that fucker in prison for the rest of his fucking life, unless, of course, no, no, no, never mind, I better not say that on camera. The Lord's out there now, if you're a Lord, you know. You know if you're playing the game. Yes, yes, what? We're not saying anything, okay.
Eric:We're not saying shit.
Matt:We're not saying anything other than he is guilty and he should go to prison. So another big event that, as of right now, nothing is preventing this from happening. There are attempts to prevent it, but as of this writing, on January 1st 2024, steamboat Willie, that is to say Mickey Mouse, will be entering the public domain. Yes, as of right now.
Matt:Disney has not version of Mickey Mouse that version of Mickey Mouse, the Steamboat Willie version and the other, like early versions, are all set to enter public domain on January 1st. Disney, of course, is trying to stop this, but they have yet to succeed against December 10th. So you know, if that changes, maybe there'll be a put in.
Eric:Yeah, who can say, I do also have Disney related ones.
Matt:But what my called shot here is not only is that it will enter the public domain, and with almost immediately, a horror film version of Steamboat Willie.
Eric:Yes, yes, it'll be called Steamboat Willie's. Like it's right there Dangling my two Disney related ones.
Matt:Yeah two.
Eric:And they're tied together. Yeah, one, well, tied together in a yin. Yang kind of sense I got it. One Disney will announce they're pulling out of Florida.
Matt:Okay, interesting, disney leaves Florida. Well, once it floats away.
Eric:Weirdly enough, I, if Disney, pulls out of Florida, I don't think it'll be because of Ron DeSantis, I think it'll be because the state is sinking Like the insurance shit that's happening there, like at some point Disney might go. Yep, not worth having a natural disaster occur in our car. We better go.
Matt:Where would they go? Where would Disney World go? And Universal too? You know they're going to save that. Where are they going to?
Eric:go yeah, Disney World. It would still be somewhere like temperate where it's like.
Matt:I'm going to say South Carolina.
Eric:South Carolina. I could see it. I could see it.
Matt:I don't think that I'm not putting that on my card. I'm just saying that'd be one of. The Carolinas is what they choose.
Eric:Or they go Hail Mary, hawaii. No way, no way. Hawaii, make it, no fucking. Oh no, it shouldn't happen and it would be awful, but like if I was bingo calling this Hawaii.
Matt:Although, if Disney, if you're going to go to any place and take over the state, head on down to Texas. Baby, that's what I say Take over.
Eric:Texas. Make them sweat when they see you moving in.
Matt:I mean any place would to be honest. If they moved into Maryland we'd all be like, oh no.
Eric:Think of the taxes. So that's Disney prediction one. We're on the flip side. Disney will buy Florida DAD.
Matt:Disney. Disney buys Florida. How would that work? How would Disney purchase it? What would the Florida purchase from Disney look like?
Eric:So I don't know the legal anything for this, but if we're going for, like, actually, what do I think the real world mechanisms for this would be, it would be, something like Florida is that they're not only going to be borrowing Disney so much money that Disney effectively owns Florida.
Matt:That's so funny, that's good, that's good.
Eric:I like that.
Matt:Like they purchase their debts. I have two Olympic related activities, Okay. So, first of all, the first one is likely to happen, and I say that without tooting my own horn, I'm just saying historically it's the pattern. But the United States USA baby will win both the most medals of the Summer Olympics and the most gold medals.
Eric:Okay, we are USA.
Matt:And again.
Eric:USA.
Matt:That statistically, is the likeliest thing to happen. So I did throw in a. I countered my own likely outcome with a pie in the sky called shot.
Eric:Okay.
Matt:There are a number of nations in this Olympics and in general, who have never won a Summer Olympic medal ever, and a number of the ones involved in this Olympics only have one competitor, so I've chosen to bump my odds up ever so slightly by going with the country that has never won a Summer Olympic medal and has three competitors. That'd be our good friends, rwanda. Oh, hell yeah, rwanda. Rwanda will win its first.
Matt:Olympic medal, get it. Rwanda, that's my called shot Olympic wins, first Summer Olympic medal, and that the US leads all medals and gold medals.
Eric:Okay when I have speaking of contests of strength, a billionaire will try to fight orcas and lose.
Matt:Okay, I love it. Say more.
Eric:I'm thinking like as a as, probably like a publicity stunt or something, or legitimate business interest, like some millionaire, billionaire piece of shit will get so pissed off that yachts are getting sunk by orcas. He's going to like put together a mercenary team to go hunt orcas and they're just going to get their asses handed to them.
Matt:They will be embarrassingly defeated by and I know where you're coming from with this, but I don't know that the listeners do. If you're not aware, orcas have chosen to pick a fight with humans in recent months.
Eric:Remember I was talking about spotted lanternflies didn't have natural predators. Well, neither did yachts, until they met orcas.
Matt:Orcas have suddenly, in the last couple of months, decided to just start attacking boats.
Matt:Yeah.
Matt:And you know not undeservingly so.
Eric:No, yeah, they're just sinking the shit out of any boats that come near them, and I'm rooting for the orcas.
Matt:What it is is one orca saw blackfish, and now is it's just it has it has planted in the ape style, cultivated an army.
Eric:I'm just imagining the orca holding little underwater sticks, orcas together strong.
Matt:Yes, just pointing at a projection, at a PowerPoint. Yes, at a Google slide Down there on the other floor. So those are most of my like. These things will happen. I do have a best picture nominee. Oh, now I am prepared, eric, I am prepared for you to give me flak for choosing only a nominee and not a best picture winner.
Eric:Okay, but.
Matt:I don't think necessarily this film will win best picture. I think it will be nominated and I think it will anger people. Is that enough for you, or do I need to call best picture?
Eric:No, no, no, that's perfect, you can be.
Matt:I love specificity. Well, that's what I'm saying. Is it more specific to call the best picture winner as opposed to just an nominee?
Eric:Oh no, I'll take a nomination, it's, it's Then.
Matt:I am nominating. The Academy will nominate Barbie as a best picture nominee.
Eric:Love it. Cosine, cosine, cosine and oh man, yeah, I could see it taking best picture. I could see it.
Matt:I could see it, but I don't think I would give it to it personally, but I do. I do, authentically, bit free, think it should be nominated 100% should be.
Eric:I cried seven times during that movie. It's a great film. It was so beautiful.
Matt:I have yet to see killers of the flower moon, but I think that is being hailed as the front runner along with Oppenheimer, but in in terms of actual front runners. But I do think Barbie should be nominated and if it did win I wouldn't be mad. But again, I have yet to see some of the other things and, of course, we don't know the nominees yet. But so that I think I'm just looking at my list. I think that's all the things that definitely like surround an event taking place. I am going to call a shot that I think everyone wants to see. Taylor and Travis are getting engaged. Folks.
Eric:I have Taylor Swift gets engaged.
Matt:Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey get engaged.
Matt:We both had it.
Matt:I think it's great.
Eric:Yeah, I want the world for that we all want it.
Matt:You know I hate American football, as you all know. But hey, I've seen the clips of the Kelsey Brothers podcast. I'm all in on these Kelsey Brothers. They're delightful. And listen honestly, if Tay Tay loves you, it's good enough for me, baby yeah.
Eric:Yeah, good enough for me.
Matt:So go get them Taylor's husband to be that's what I say and brother-in-law.
Eric:Okay, speaking of called shots, this one goes out to a very specific fandom, one that I'm certain Matt is not a part of, but I would like to change that. I'm going to call it now. Finland wins Eurovision.
Matt:Ooh, Finland wins Eurovision and.
Eric:I'm going to be, I'm going to, I'm going to be real with you all. I'm calling this one out of spite because Finland was robbed last Eurovision, one of the few times that the that the judges did not vote in step with the audience because, as far as the audience was concerned, finland won that shit, and then the judges decided that Sweden won it.
Matt:Interesting. I you know I don't follow Eurovision as much as I'd like to, but I do not to your comment of you don't think I'm in the community. I'm not in the sense that, like I don't know the dates and I don't you know, I'll get the headline that, oh, eurovision started. Yeah. But usually I'll end up listening to some of the songs that come out of Eurovision, yeah. So, I don't have no participation.
Eric:Yeah, we're going to get you. I'm, I'm, matt. You will fucking love Eurovision. It has everything that you're, that your competition watching brain loves.
Matt:Are we? Here's something that we didn't discuss a year and a half ago when I began my rapid descent into soccer fandom, to the point that I have to say and I really I'm sure people out there who like American football are going to think it's pretentious I watch almost exclusively European soccer, so, no, I very rarely call it soccer anymore, I always call it football, because that's what they do, that's what the rest of the fucking world does.
Matt:But so yesterday, when we were recording, this was the MLS cup final between the Columbus crew and LAFC. Lafc, just right, there it is. But between the two of them and I have to say, even listening to two Americans give commentary I was like, oh my God, it sounds like American sports and I don't like that. This is what I've become. But I'm saying all this because two years ago and I you know, I'm still obsessed with baseball, I still love baseball, I still manage a fantasy baseball league that's going on year 13. God damn.
Matt:So like I'm still invested in baseball, but no one had.
Matt:Matt develops an unquenchable thirst for soccer. On the 2022 bingo card and yet here I am now I'm getting you into it. Yep, and it's working. I say all that. I say that tangent to say do we need to make an Eric and Matt? And I think it works best, if we're going to do this, that we call it for each other. Yes, we'll develop an obsession.
Eric:Yes, I'll call your shot.
Matt:You did.
Eric:Eurovision, yeah, eurovision.
Matt:For me. Would you have another one?
Eric:No, no, no, that's my choice. I want to get you into Eurovision. Very bad.
Matt:Okay, Matt, okay. So you're saying Matt gets into Eurovision and I'm going to say Eric gets into soccer.
Eric:Like into soccer.
Matt:Oh baby, you can, you can baby. Man we're going to have some conversations. I'm going to get you into rexom. It's going to be great. Anyway, here we go. Where are we?
Eric:Here's one. Okay, banksy will be revealed.
Matt:Whoa, what a good called shot, eric. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, banksy revealed I love it. I love it, eric. Okay, banksy revealed I only have a couple left.
Eric:I as well, only have a couple left.
Matt:Okay, here's one that I have Someone, and this is a little vague, so you tell me if you need me to be more specific. Someone will attend a celebrity will attend a major awards ceremony in an inflatable outfit.
Eric:Oh, that's beautiful.
Matt:Perfect.
Eric:Perfect.
Matt:No, no, and I mean like. I don't mean like as a bit. I mean someone arrives on the red carpet in a T-Rex outfit, Okay. And when I'm saying major awards, I'm saying Academy Awards, grammy Awards.
Eric:Yes, yes.
Matt:You know Emmys.
Eric:Yes, the.
Matt:Kennedy Center Honors.
Matt:Yes.
Matt:Someone attends a major award ceremony in inflatable outfit.
Eric:Yes, oh, this is a fun one. The entire student body of a K-12 school will stage a protest against virtual learning on snow days, because that is a thing that is happening now.
Matt:Eric, I couldn't react immediately because I was so agog. You're telling me that schools are out here using the Zoom technology that we developed over the pandemic. Sorry, matt, abusing the Zoom technology, yes, abusing to eliminate snow days entirely, because there is no such thing as a virtual learning day on a snow day. No no no, no, okay. So you're saying a what was it again? A K-12 school, just any school.
Eric:A kindergarten through. I could be more specific. I could say middle school, a middle school student body.
Matt:No, I get what you're talking about. Yeah, a non-undergrad.
Eric:A non-undergrad. Yeah, A K-12. A K-12. A K-12.
Matt:A student body will revolt against virtual learning during snow day.
Eric:Yes, and there are many, and I promised Alyssa I would make this reference many a jelly-filled snow nut will be held aloft that day.
Matt:Very good, eric. Very good, gwyneth Paltrow is going to change your name.
Eric:Okay, all right, all right.
Matt:Can you see that one coming? Did you no, no?
Eric:Can I hit you with? Jk Rowling will go off the grid. Okay, like JK Rowling, will go into hiding.
Matt:I kind of love it. Actually, I would love it even more if it's for a crime Like there's a police chase, she disappears, fakes her own death.
Eric:Yes, oh.
Matt:But does it so badly that the death is revealed to be fake within 48 hours?
Eric:Yes, oh, in that vein I have a celebrity who was presumed dead will come out of hiding.
Matt:I love that, eric. That's the guess, that's what we're putting on the bingo card. But if you were to throw out a nominee, an unofficial nominee, who's coming back?
Eric:I mean, I always want it to be Andy Kaufman somehow.
Matt:I was going to say we all want it to be Andy Kaufman.
Eric:Or I would, or this is just for me personally, John Hurt.
Matt:Oh my God, I do love John Hurt.
Eric:I God, John Hurt, such was oh.
Matt:I love John Hurt. Yes.
Eric:Yes.
Matt:If Elvis comes back, I'd be thrilled.
Eric:So here's another one. This is now we're getting like to the to, like towards the end of my list, when it was truly just like fuck it, I'm down to two and I'm saving my last one. I also have a one that I will definitely read last I have self-driving car, kidnaps entire family. Oh my God, is it self-aware who can say but?
Matt:no.
Eric:I think more realistically, it'll be like a malfunction. The car will take off down a highway and they won't be able to stop it.
Matt:I think that's rad, and when you say whole family, you're referring to parents and at least a child.
Eric:Yeah, it'll yes.
Matt:Okay, a nuclear family.
Eric:A nuclear family.
Matt:Okay.
Eric:I have Amazon gets broken up by the FTC.
Matt:Okay, that's a. I think you've got your work cut out for you with that. Yeah, yeah, but okay.
Eric:And now I'm down to two left, so you should go, and then I can go, and then we.
Matt:And then we'll do our last one. Yeah, okay, here's my called shot and this this'll happen with. I think the odds are low, but if it happens. You heard it here first.
Matt:Okay.
Matt:Chris Rock and Will Smith will do a Super Bowl ad together.
Matt:Oh God, Matt, now we're cooking.
Matt:I think, I don't think, I don't think it's a 0% chance, I fucking thought that I think it's unlikely.
Eric:No, but God damn, that's so good specificity.
Matt:And I'm being clear if we get a Chris Rock commercial and a Will Smith commercial nothing special about that it's got to be Will Smith and it's got to be Chris Rock together. I was actually thinking of a famous Super Bowl commercial in which Oprah was seated on the couch and was like would you two pass the popcorn? You know they're passing the popcorn. And on either side of her is David Letterman and Jay Leno in their first like appearance together since the feud, and that's what made me think of this.
Matt:So I think we're going to get a we're going to get a that style commercial.
Eric:Okay, I have my second to last one. Yeah, the tiny housing market will collapse, thank God.
Matt:The tiny house market will collapse. The bubble will pop. The bubble will pop. And let me just say why I hate tiny houses. Okay, yeah, Because these days, you know, you see them on TikTok and there's tiny house hunters and all this other shit of like. Ooh, I'm returning as if they're fucking thorough being like. I am returning to base necessity. You don't need all this stuff. You are being forced to buy a tiny house because it's the only thing you can afford because American capitalism has taken away the American dream from our clutches.
Matt:And you are celebrating the fact that we have to settle for a shack and call it a villa. I refuse, I refuse and yes.
Matt:I just Keep your thatched roof rancher. You keep your van house to yourself, okay, and yes, sure, maybe Lindsay and I just bought a full on fucking house and don't want to be alone. But maybe you should take a hard look at yourself as an American, unless you're in Washington or Texas, in which case Stay, put, stay put right now.
Eric:Let it stew, but don't let it boil over.
Matt:Don't commit to that bit. We're already on the verge of a civil war for other reasons. Don't make us attack Seattle. Don't make us do that. Don't make us take out the Alamo again.
Eric:No, nobody wants that so, all that to say, I hope that the tiny house market collapses. And I do lapses because more people can actually get affordable, actual homes.
Matt:Yeah, how about this? How about the tiny house? Market collapses and homes start being worth what they're actually worth again.
Eric:Yeah, god, let normal houses be dirt cheap. Let tiny houses go back to being sheds with, you know, moonroofs.
Matt:And I'll put it this way, eric, there's a house down the street for me that is Ramshackle. I mean broken windows, has been abandoned, it, it's beat up, it's got fucking mold on the side of the house that you can visibly see. You can see the ghosts like. The lot is terrible. It's all overgrown, it's a piece of shit. It's a. It's a. It's a ranch. I don't know if it has a basement, but it doesn't have a second story. It's a piece of shit. And on fucking redfin I went to see how much the whoever owns this property is charging for it. It's still like 250,000. My guy Yep, I was gonna say I carry at least 200k.
Eric:It's like 800 square feet Maybe maybe, maybe, 800 square feet when it's wet when soaking wet and it expands outward.
Matt:Yeah Well, the unfinished wood swelling in the rain because the the walls aren't connected at the bottom so it spreads out in in water, in standing water. Yeah, Splays okay, so we got two left.
Eric:I'm down to my last one.
Matt:All right, you want to go first. You want me to go first?
Eric:up to you, buddy, up to you. I, I give you, I give you dealer's choice.
Matt:Let's hear it Eric go for okay.
Eric:Here's my. This is probably the most spaghetti at the wall. Hi, you know what I hope? I hope this happens, mm-hmm. I, and I will be shocked if it does. Okay fire festival 2 will go off without a hitch. Whoa.
Matt:Under that name.
Eric:Under that name. It's happening.
Matt:Is that?
Eric:24? Yeah, it's planned at the end of 2024. It's gonna be happening in the Caribbean. Fire festival 2 will go off without a hitch and they're calling it fire. Fyre, same fucking people.
Matt:Okay, I didn't even know that was happening. So, yeah, it bet. You know what it better.
Eric:It better go off of that I am, I am, I am ready to be surprised.
Matt:Okay, well then, good, because I've got one that fits the same bill. Okay, I want this to happen and I think it's extremely unlikely to happen. Okay, amelia Airheart's remains will be found fuck.
Eric:Yes, closure for my girl.
Matt:Hashtag girl boss, am I right?
Eric:Amelia Found I.
Matt:Think also. I think I should get an automatic bingo if I could pair it with you if Amelia airheart turns out to still be alive, I think.
Matt:I get an automatic.
Eric:How about this, so that it's actually physically possible for me to win? On that opposite end, we discover that Amelia this ties with like celebrity, presumed dead.
Matt:Oh, I see okay.
Eric:Turns out that Amelia airheart was living in like Montreal until her 90s and died in like 2001 and you get.
Matt:I love that. Of all the locations she's been rumored to be hiding this whole time, you chose Montreal, montreal, because I'd you, if you remember, like three or four years ago, maybe even longer, probably longer, with the pandemic, there were pictures that were unearthed from like the 60s or 70s or something, on an island where people were like of people on a dock and people were like that's Amelia airheart, like the like that she was living in this remote island nation, I forget where, like let's just call it, let's say Vanuatu. You know, yes, it was somewhere down there she was living, but I don't think that was proven to be correct. But plenty of people think Amelia airheart did not die on her voyage. So we'll see.
Eric:I I hope she lived to a ripe old age Knowing she did the thing.
Matt:I think so too, and I I did say, remains I, we Biological. I think it's not enough to find her plane. No, you gotta find her bones I some if they find her plane with her DNA. Okay, I take it sick. Confirmation she's dead. Yeah, so that's my last one.
Eric:Okay, and that was your last. That's it. That's it we did it.
Matt:That gives us 39 or 38 options that are on the bingo Cards, eric and I, just like last year, unless you think we need to do this live, no, no, no, from this selection, eric, we can pick what we want to be on our card. There will be extras Because we're only picking 24.
Eric:Yep, yep.
Matt:So there will be extras and that means you folks can go ahead and Click the link in the show notes to build your own. You didn't ask for this bingo card and we will need it by the end of January. It has to be by the end of January and if you, if you successfully get a bingo, you get to be on this show, no matter what, even if you've already been on the show. You've already been on the show, you get to come back. You'll see it when you go to fill out your card. It will have all the options laid out for you and you can just drag it on to the top screen and you can either screenshot it, print it out as a PNG and cut the bottom off, however you want to do it. You could submit the whole thing and I'll fix it. You know. Whatever you want to do, send it, send it to me, send it to us.
Matt:So you didn't ask for this gmailcom and we will. We'll even post your submission on our Instagram page and be like here are the submissions. We didn't do that last year, but we'll do it this year if we get, if we get some. So choose bingo, choose, choose bingo. Eric, I think we have some really fun candidates in this.
Matt:Oh yeah we're, we're sitting pretty, it's gonna be the only rules for us, eric, if I am correct, is the center square will be. You didn't ask for this. Reaches top five on good parts, mm-hmm right. Yeah, yeah and free square you have to include that Georgia R Martin will die. I have to include the Justin Bieber will die. Yes, you do, you monster. How am I the monster? You want to cut off a song of ice and fire I?
Eric:wish to trim the flower After it is bloomed. You wish to cut it down in its prime, eric.
Matt:I.
Matt:Yeah, okay, yeah, I mean what. I was gonna give you a pushback, but what you've said is a description of what's happening. Yeah, but he has two more books to write. I yes, he does. He has two more books. Right? If Bebe and of course the Bebes has more gifts to give us, I'm sure I can't all be. What's that?
Eric:I can't believe you right now.
Matt:Don't pretend like you're a believer.
Eric:No, I'm just saying I can't believe. Is that what they call themselves? Yeah?
Matt:Yeah, it is. Oh, I have predetermined that 2024 will be the year that I become a full Swifty.
Matt:I've been like cool, cool, cool up until this point, I've considered myself like a popular Swifty. You know, I know all the big songs, I like them, blah, blah, blah. But I haven't heard every album straight through. But I'm gonna. I've started at the beginning and I'm like listening to complete albums. Tay Tay will be on my Spotify rap next year. I'm determined oh, we didn't do that, did we? We didn't say a, you'll get really into this. Oh, yeah, we did your vision and talk. Yeah, we did you're. We didn't talk, we did. What am I do? You know what that is? That's a sign to end the show. Matt, give him the business I would love to Folks. We need your questions. We need your local legends that you want us to do. We need your neighborhood fights. We need Anything you want to give us, especially your bingo cards.
Matt:Oh yes, please, please, babies definitely your bingo cards, and you can share them with us so many ways. Of course, the pre mentioned you didn't ask for this. Gmailcom is always there for you, as is Our various social media accounts at. You didn't ask pod. That's the letter. You didn't ask, pod. You may also leave us a voicemail that we will, in all likelihood, play on the show. Yes, one zero, nine, two, nine, five, three, two, nine. That's the thought line. Baby, give me, give the Yaddaf thought line a call.
Eric:And yeah, eric, I think that's the business right, I think you gave it to him pretty good.
Matt:So it's a new year. Happy new year to you all From our place here in 2024 and definitely not with 20 days remaining in in 2023. So, as always, thank you for listening to us for, and joining us for, yet another year. We love you all. We appreciate you all. Eric, what would you like to say to the people?
Eric:gang 2023 behind us, 2024 ahead. I want you all to take on 24. Like Jack Bauer, I want you kicking down doors.
Matt:I Know, you're speaking to my soul now, right? I?
Eric:know I want you Every day. I want you to hear the clock ticking and, knowing that you were Jack motherfucking Bauer in this 24, you're not inside. Care, you are not.
Matt:You're not gonna get killed off, you are gonna fight Tooth you're gonna fucking nail, you're gonna fight with that main character energy that you have inside of you.
Eric:Yes, fight like the like. You're the author's favorite fight. Like you're Tyrion. Fight like Tyrion.
Matt:Tyrion Bauer, tyrion Bauer, your way through this year and that and it, hey if that means killing several of your family members because they're revealed to be terrorists, that's what it will.
Matt:That's what it's about.
Matt:That's what you will have to do, but until that time yes for all of us here at you to ask for this.
Eric:My name is Matthew Shay, my name is Eric poach and listen, you didn't ask, but you know what I've legitimately been thinking of for the last hour and a half. Yes, what like since? Like since the way back Since we started recording. Yes, we sponsored a sports team. Would they be called the yaddaft elites?
Matt:The yaddaft elites, if we're accepting the Las Vegas athletics.
Eric:I feel like the yaddaft elites.
Matt:Eric, you can't have an attitude because you just found out what a major sports team name is named.
Eric:I look I could have an attitude about anything, or what if I just found out murder was illegal? I'd be like, yeah good, wouldn't make me wrong just cuz I just found out.
Matt:I like the yaddaft elites for sure. Okay you didn't ask for this talent. I'll work on the tagline.
Eric:So it was like hey, poach, you want it. Here's this thing you've never heard of before. It's called a lima bean. I took one smell of them and I was like you, this smells fucking gross. It would be getting an attitude just to know that I won't like that thing. I fucking hate lima beans, I fuck.
Matt:I don't know that. I know enough about lima beans to have an opinion on them.
Eric:I have never had a lima bean. I have enjoyed in my entire life.
Matt:Well then, I'm not tabbing one. I'm not a man.
Eric:Good man.
Matt:Thank you.
Eric:Fuck lima beans. That's what 2024 is gonna be about, fuck lima beans. Thank you, down doors, don't eat lima beans enough sad. It was just like ended on the 24 beeps. I'm good yeah.
Matt:All right, I'm stopping this.
Matt:No, yeah.